Pearls and Grace

Vintage Grace Opening

2012-02-09T08:55:00.000-06:00

Good Morning! I wanted to thank you all so much for your encouragement and your kind words this week! We are so grateful for this new thing the Lord is doing in our lives and as we head into Spring, I am full of great anticipation and hope that maybe this is a turning point for our family.

So many new things.

Speaking of which, we survived the moving in day! It ended up taking me two days to get everything moved in and set up and styled for Valentine's Day! :) My Hubby helped me move furniture all day while listening to me talk about stuff like how the double faced satin ribbon needed to "cascade down off of the hang tags"......

Hello.

I'm pretty sure he is looking forward to going to the gym today and lifting weights and doing man stuff.
(While secretly praying that God deliver him from all things girly - girl in this house!)

And guess how good God is?

Once I started moving in the two sweet ladies who own the store were so generous and gave me a second space for the next few weeks.

Twirls.

Grateful me.

There was some twirling going on in Booth B-7 this week girls.:)

I wanted to leave you with a few IPhone pictures. They are not the greatest but I am grateful to have them since I failed to charge the battery for the big camera! I was too busy planning the store set and the floor move! :)

Here are a few pictures! More to come soon!

Thank you again for your prayers and your encouragement!

Vintage Grace

2012-02-06T11:36:00.002-06:00

I remember the phone call like it was yesterday.

It came exactly 78 days ago this very morning.

My husband called from NYC to let me know that he had been released from his job, along with a group of others.

It wasn't the first time this had happened to us. Or the second. It is the nature of his business.

But it didn't make it any easier.

In one breath I was thanking God. I was rejoicing. I was celebrating. I was beside myself.

After two and half years almost, My husband was finally coming home.

And then in another breath, I was gripped with fear and felt panic strike at my heart.

I would see-saw between the two for weeks.

We did our best to dig deep into our faith and trust. The kind of trusting and holding on that comes when the rug has been jerked out from underneath you so many times you don't even know what it feels like to stand on solid ground.

We clung to Him. And we prayed. We celebrated that Daddy was home and we fought fear and the "what-if's" and the "this is not really happening to us...again" thoughts.

And we pressed on. With faith and tears and learning how to trust on a new level.

I've walked a few years in my faith to know that anytime you want to do something for God- the enemy will do everything he can to stop it.

And I had just worked out all the details to host the next Pearl Event.

Just.

I can remember my husband standing in the middle of the room looking at me.....

A man who has fought for everything he's ever received. He knows how to fight.

And he said these words. "Honey, we are still going to do The Pearl Event."

I can't tell you how that ministered to me. How it breathed life into me. How my mind tried to reason that we simply could not and my heart fell head over heels in love with him all over again.

Because when your man believes in your dreams, to the point of sacrificing to make sure they come to pass. Well, you want to marry him all over again.

And making sure The Pearl Event happens and Pearls and Grace Ministries continues is my number one dream.

My husband had also just heard a wonderful teaching from a church through a podcast and the title was called "Burn The Ships."

It was life changing.

The teaching talked about how sometimes God will "burn our ships" so to speak, so that we have no way to turn around and go back, or leave, or give up. We have to continue moving forward in a new direction.

For the last 78 days God has made it very clear that we are to move forward in a new direction.

One being The Pearl Event.

In the midst of all of this some other dreams inside my heart began to stir.

And we felt the Lord's prompting to move forward with those.

So for the last couple of months we've been busy creating and planning and holding the Lord's hand asking for wisdom and guidance.

In the meantime, I have finally been able to sleep for more than just a few hours each night. And apparently, getting some sleep will help flood your creativity with lots of ideas.

Mama's been busy.

So tomorrow, this former retail girl and "all things home" obsessed girl, who changes her furniture around every week and who has done this for years girl, this former party planner girl, former flower designer girl and long time girly-girl who still twirls on occasion, is opening her own tiny vintage home goods business.

Now I know some of you may be scratching your head and may be thinking to yourself, well you never even write about home stuff!

And to answer that, all I can say is that from day one I have devoted this blog to Him.

Most of the time writing about whatever He prompts me to write about. I usually pray before I write each post, and ask Him what He wants me to share.

And then together we write. I love writing with the Lord....

And I also have a few more dreams too....

Sometimes we have dreams and desires that just lie dormant for years.

Life gets in the way.

Circumstances and situations and marriage and babies and working 9 to 5 to pay the bills, takes priority above what we used to dream about doing.

Or sometimes we can even push our own dreams down deep inside our hearts, dismissing the very thing God has called us to do. Sometimes we can feel that since we do not have the certifications or degrees or someone's stamp of approval in whatever the field is, then we aren't really "qualified."

I have discovered that this is not always true.

I love this saying..."God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called."

Here's hoping!

Last week I signed a contract for three months, to rent out the sweetest, little space inside a wonderful store. When I asked the Lord about the time frame of the contract, He spoke these words to my heart....

This is the first trimester of something new I'm birthing through you.

Honey words. Healing words. Hopeful words.

Grateful me.

I named it Vintage Grace. In fact, it is that very thing, that has held me during this time. And so many other times in my life.

So the name is really significant to me.

And just as a side note, apparently taking your man to the lumbar department of Home Depot and hauling around 2 x4's on a cart while carrying around his sixth child on your hip is a man's love language all by itself! Who knew?

I will also be launching, with lots of faith and my Canon 7D in tow, business and dream number two. I am leaping into photography as a business again, after closing that door years ago, to focus on growing our family.

So starting two new businesses and planning and producing The Pearl Event, all within the first three months of this year.

Apparently I'm pregnant ...

Truly expectant with dreams and business ideas and a special ministry to women.

It only took my husband losing his job for me to see the two pink lines....

Commit everything you do to the Lord, trust Him and He will help you. - Psalm 37:5

Unspoken

2012-01-28T16:40:00.002-06:00

I love to listen.

I am not always the best at it, but I really love it when the opportunity presents itself.

I understand that it really is an art form.

I have found over the years that to really listen is to also hear what is not being said as well.

To hear the unspoken words.....

To discover them. To uncover them. To bring them to the surface. To open that up for discussion.

That is a gift.

And if you can find yourself a confidante who can hear the unspoken words... hang on to her.

If she can tell even over the phone, by the inflections in your voice that something is wrong.

Really wrong.

Even though you are telling her everything is fine.

Hang on to her.

Women pass the word "fine" around like an after dinner mint.

We are fine. I'm fine. The kids are fine. Everything is fine. I feel fine.

Many times, over the years, I have responded on the other end of the line...."No you are not."

"Talk to me."

Then the tears come....

And from years of trying to work on my listening skills, I can say that there is a lot
that is stuffed underneath the four letter word I will call fine.

For starters it can mean this....

You don't really care. So I'm not going to tell you what is really going on.

You don't have the time.

If I tell you what is really going on, you will judge me. criticize me, gossip about me or drop me like a hot potato.

So instead of being real. Having a real friendship. Walking in true friendship.

I'm just going to offer up a small piece of myself, just the surface, if you're lucky.

And the two of us can just wade around in the baby pool together because I am not about to go into the
deep end, called my reality, with anybody.

I might drown in discovering that my real friends aren't really my real friends after all.

And I can't handle that truth. So I'm just going to hang out right here in the shallow end.

I don't think that is what God meant when He said it is not good for man to be alone....

Because when we only go surface deep with others- when we do not allow the depth of our hearts to be known- even though we may have a lot of friends, we are really still alone.

And lonely is not a place that God has called any of us to reside.

There are married people who are lonely. The most "popular" girls in our towns are lonely. Pastors and ministers and wives of clergy, who pour their hearts out for the gospel on a daily basis, feel completely alone.

Why?

Because the deep end is scary.

And sharing the authentic pieces of our life with someone takes courage.

For some of us, the thoughts of possible abandonment from "friends" and church members and parents at school is just too much to think about. It's easier to play it safe and just continue wading around in the shallow end of life.

But the truth will set us free......

I would rather have one real friend, who really knows me, than a thousand "friends" who only go surface deep with me.

I would rather have one church service, with one real pastor, sharing his real testimony, than to listen to something else any day.

I would rather have one friend tell me what is really going on in her life- the good, the bad and the beautiful - than five friends who only want to talk about surface things.

It is a dance of truth and honor and trust to begin to allow someone to hear the unspoken things in our hearts. And to offer that same gift to someone else as well.

It is, for some of us, starting over again with fear and trembling in friendship, in leadership, in marriage and in ministry.

It isn't easy.

It is scary jumping into the deep end.

But we can't really swim in the shallow end.

We can't jump off the high dive or do a back flip in the shallow end.

But God hasn't called us to live this full life, this abundant life, simply standing in shallow water, or keeping everything surface level.

He's called us out into the deep.

There is so much more to you than you have allowed anyone to know. We are not meant to do life alone. We are not meant to walk around responding to everything with the word "fine." We are not meant to walk through pain and suffering and hardship completely solo. We need others to hold up our arms during our trials. We need others to speak faith and hope and love into our situations. Our real situations. We need encouragement and support and a trustworthy friend like we need air to breathe.

Allow the unspoken words to come forth sweet friends.

Allow the deep chapters written in you to begin to come forth.

And then listen for the unspoken words in someone else....

This is how we can demonstrate the gospel.

This is how we can demonstrate who He really is and why He really came.

And every single time we hold back, every single time we live life like we are less than, every single time we tell friends that everything is fine, when it really isn't. Every single time we refuse to share the deep places or refuse to really listen to the unspoken words in the heart of another - we hold back the gospel.

And we need the gospel.

In action and in deed. In the shallow end and in the deep. In the spoken and in the unspoken.
In the painful places and in the beautiful ones. In the days of living and in the days of dying.
In the days of the just things and the unjust. In the days of pouring rain and wretchedness. And in the days of birthing and living and writing and singing.

My hope is that this would be a year of listening and hearing and sharing the unspoken words in one another sweet friends. I pray that the word "fine" would leave our vocabulary and that as we have the courage to offer up the deep places, the scary places and the real places in our hearts, that God would meet us there with the gift of a genuine friend......

He's Fighting For You Today

2012-01-25T18:09:00.002-06:00

I think it is human nature to want to defend ourselves. To want to protect.

To desire to right every wrong.

To call the friend to the carpet who actually hasn't been a friend at all.

To try to make things, situations and circumstances just.

But the Lord has a better way. He says in His word that He will fight our battles for us.

I can't count the times I have gone ahead of Him and tried to make it right on my own.

It is so much better if we just let Him fight our battles for us.

I wanted to share a little video with you all today in hopes that it will speak to your heart about this very thing. Just imagine the Lord fighting for you today- Julia Sugarbaker Style.

"The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace." Exodus 14:14

Things That Make A Grown Woman Twirl

2012-01-20T10:02:00.001-06:00

Good Morning! I wanted to pop in and share the logo design and blog button with you all!

Beth Hart Designs caught the vision and I love her for it! She is really wonderful to work with!

I feel like I need to wear a pair of pretty, white gloves while I am typing here at the keyboard:)

It's a little bit Garden and Gun and a little bit Town and Country. I hope you like it too!

Thank you to all of you who have already purchased your tickets! We are 50 percent sold for the event!

As of today, 100 of you are going to be joining us!! I'm twirling.....

I am also thanking Him for entrusting me with something so beautiful and so special.

This is truly His event and His vision and His purpose. Grateful me.

To have these amazing speakers partner with me in ministry and then to have all of you to come alongside this event and support it has blessed me in ways I am not sure I can express.

Things that make a grown woman twirl....

Thank you sweet friends.

Thank you for your love and support and prayers. For your emails and comments. For your posts and links and words that have been like honey to my soul. I treasure you...

Here is a pretty, little blog button. You can just hyperlink it here if you want.

Here is the link for the Facebook page if you want to join in and connect with others who will be attending as well!

https://www.facebook.com/#!/events/154366354668098/

Here is the link to the ticket page and to register for the event if you want to join us!

http://thepearlevent-ehometext.eventbrite.com/

Here is a little glimpse of the Magnolia Ballroom where a whole bunch of real life Steel Magnolia's will be gathering together in just 49 more days!

Twirling and praying in my pearls......

County and State

2012-01-19T12:08:00.001-06:00

source

If I heard it once, I heard it a thousand times throughout my life.

You know those little phrases that Mama's will often use to get their point across?

Well my Mama had a thousand of them. She had a saying for everything.

"Fair?"

"Nothing's fair honey."

"Fairs come twice a year."

"County and State."

It was one of those things that just sticks with you in life.

I've spent most of my life trying to prove her wrong.

Trying to make my county and my state happen over here, at the very least, on a daily basis.

And there were days that those words rang true. And I would think to myself, maybe she was right.

Fairs only do come twice a year.

I often wondered at times what she really meant by that.

My Mama said what she thought. And then some.

Kind of like a bold New Yorker trapped in a southern woman's body.

You knew where you stood but you'd better brace yourself. She called a spade, a spade.

I'd rather hear that than the alternative any day. I'd rather hear the truth- plain and simple.

My grandmother was the exact same way.

And I just so happened to inherit that same lovely trait....

Although, after a lot of mistakes and some growing years and after throwing myself at the feet of Jesus a thousand times I've received the help I needed. I'm still a work in progress but now, I try to tell it like it is only when I'm asked to.

I know she had her share of things in life that were tragic. Really unfair things.

I wonder at times if that was what she was referring to...

As if to say, look honey, it hasn't worked out for our family yet.

It didn't work out for my Mama.

It didn't work out for me.

And it's not going to work out for you either.

So don't even think about getting your hopes up.

Maybe hoping to spare me any future disappointment...

Or maybe it was to soften the devastation, as if minimizing whatever crisis had hit, would help it all to somehow make sense.

As if to say...look, "fair" isn't something that happens in this house.

Or in this family.

Or in this lifetime.

Fairs are for the county and the state and that's the only kind of fair you are ever going to get.

I don't fault her or blame her.

I'm sure that she was trying to make sense of a lot of things in her own life.

I wasn't exactly the daughter Mothers dream of.

But sometimes parents can stunt a child's growth if they high jack their hope.

If we don't encourage and teach and offer anything any different than the way things have always been- then sometimes children can grow up and completely miss their calling, simply because it doesn't fit into whatever box or role or plan the family has always walked in.

History can sometimes repeat itself. But it doesn't have to.

We don't have to live the same life that generations before us have lived. We don't have to become bitter and cynical and mad at the world, always waiting for the next shoe to drop.

We do not have to live in a constant state of fear or excessive mourning.

Or spend our whole life "wishing for what never was."

We do not have to walk around believing that "fairs" only come twice a year.
(Or it's never going to happen for me, it's never going to be my turn.)

The enemy would love for every one of us to believe that lie.

After many years of living like that I decided a long time ago that I was going to go ahead and experience "fair" on a daily basis.

I'm going to ride the Ferris Wheel in life.

Whether people are really for me or not.

Whether people say what they really mean or not.

Whether the odds are stacked against me or not. I'm going to try. I have to.

I'm going to stand in line at the concession stand in life and see what the Lord has behind the counter for me. Instead of choosing to accept whatever others feel I should and should not receive in life because it doesn't seem to fit into their realm of possibility for me.

There may not always be things that I would like on the menu.

There may not always be cotton candy filled days.

But I know that He has a plan and a purpose.

Even in the midst of so many things I don't understand.

Even in the midst of some really unfair things and some tremendous heartache in life.

I know He has a ticket for me.

An entrance into a divinely appointed fairground filled with life lessons, character development opportunities and chances to cling to Him. Along with many enjoyable surprises as well.

I don't have to look longingly at everyone else's tickets.

I can wait my turn and know that I know that I know that my turn- my county and my state...

They are coming.

And it is going to be more than just twice a year.

And it will be for you as well....

Squeal Fest 2012

2012-01-17T17:06:00.000-06:00

I'm not sure how many of you have ever witnessed or even participated in a "Squeal Fest" but I will tell you, just in case you haven't....

It is ALL manner of fun.

It also may involve meeting someone in real life you have loved and prayed for and wanted to meet for a very long time. When you finally have the chance, you may actually find yourself running across the parking lot of The Varsity in Atlanta, Georgia squealing like a teenager who is about to meet her best girlfriend in front of the skating rink. Honestly. We may have made a scene.

I had a little business trip to Atlanta recently and decided that it was high time that I meet my sweet blog buddy in real life.

Please meet my beautiful friend Paige from Simple Thoughts!

Paige is also one of the speakers for the upcoming Pearl Event and you all are going to fall head over heels in love with her!

The blog world meets real life is such a special thing.
For years you read someone's heart and get "to know them" so to speak.
Then to have the chance to meet that friend in real life....to put a voice with the words and the humor and the personality you have come to know and love in the blog world....

It is really wonderful!

Especially when that person exceeds your expectations.....

I somehow just knew she would....

She is a lot like Edie, in that, she is even better in real life!!!

Let me break it down for you in a few words and some really special pictures.

Paige is every shade of awesome.

She looks just like a movie star and has the boots to prove it, but is so genuine and authentic and gracious and kind, she puts you right at ease.

She is really, really beautiful. Matched equally in heart, spirit and personality. I loved her....

She also just so happens to be a hugger! Thank goodness! That makes five huggers speaking at The Pearl Event! Check. Check.

I may have to get them matching t-shirts for the big weekend....

I also finally had the chance to meet Dan! I heart Dan:)

I think much of blog world has a crush on him! He is an absolute sweetheart ! If you haven't already, you will enjoy reading the stories about how he has loved those four girls as well as Paige over the years... get the Kleenex.

Beautiful recompense.

I met "Little Bit" as well! Oh my heavens. I loved her! We talked about all things ballet, girlfriends and Justin Bieber. Apparently a close friend of hers has his phone number.....:)

Little Bit's twinkle toes....sweetness.

My girl and her dream gumball machine.

I hope you will join us for the big weekend on March 10. We are so looking forward to meeting you and spending the day together. Edie and her sweetheart will be there, as well as Paige and Dan. Two of my wonderful real life friends Sara and Jane will also be there sharing their stories and encouraging us that day as well! Just 52 more days or about 7 short weeks!

We are also planning on a blogger/reader meet -up on Friday night, March 9 at the Opryland Hotel for those of you who are interested. So I will share the details about that once we get it worked out on our end!

Thank you so much to all of you for your love, prayers and support about the event.

Grateful me.

Counting down the days sweet friends.....

Magnum Opus

2012-01-10T09:23:00.002-06:00

If someone were to ask me today what is your greatest life's work?

I would answer with a heart full of humility and love and gratitude and thanksgiving.

And I would show you a picture of the most beautiful gift of grace on earth.

It is my first born gift. My darling Macey Girl.

The one whom I've loved and raised and adored and been blessed by for twenty two years.

Twenty two years ago on this very day.

The one whom the Lord entrusted me with at the tender age of eighteen years old.

We all know that at eighteen years old, there is still much knowledge to gain.

But He entrusted me anyway.....grace made manifest.

When I think back about how scared to death I was, but at how the Lord, whom I did not know,
filled me with a courage that was not from this world, to push through the truckloads of adversity, it is absolutely overwhelming to me.....
How we walked through and managed and struggled and still somehow by His grace, pushed through...

The pointing of the finger by many.

The rejection.

The judgment.

The heartbreak.

The loneliness.

The abandonment of every, single, high school friend, save one.

It's easy to create when everyone loves you.

To create a masterpiece when everyone is for you.

To create something beautiful when everyone is cheering you on.

It is about nearly impossible to create anything when everyone is against you.

To grow a beautiful child in heartbreaking conditions...."impossible" they told me.

"Those two will never make it", they said behind my back.

She is just "white trash", they said.

Having a child out of wedlock is a sin, you know.

You will end up just being "a statistic". The two of you "don't have a chance", they said.

The judgment alone we walked through day after day after day, in the middle of the bible belt, with a church on every corner, mind you, was enough to send one into an early grave.

And there were days that I didn't want to stand any more. I couldn't stand any more.

And then here she would come, with great, big, chocolate, brown eyes and the sweetest disposition on earth, and I would melt into a puddle and think to myself , and sometimes I was really brave and would even say it out loud....."Lord, if you really do exist, please Lord, please help us get through this.

"This" was just another Wednesday, when the car didn't start and the lights were cut off, again.

And if I was late to work one more time, I was going to lose my job. And if I didn't pay the day care all the money I owed them, they were not going to allow my baby girl to remain enrolled there.

And the man, whom I thought was going to be my future husband one day, at the time, decided to raise his hand again, sending me right into the emergency room where they proceeded to staple the crown of my head back together.

The very crown of my head, split right in two.

The pieces turned into pieces that become more pieces.

When your heart is in pieces and your life is in pieces and your trust has been broken....into pieces.

It is a divine platform for the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End, the One who is the greatest creator ever known, the ultimate Magnum Opus.....God Almighty, to step right in and take
every, single piece of our life and orchestrate it all together in such a way.....

That twenty two years later, on the very day it all began...

You could stand boldly, with confidence in Him, with a knowing that this, the very thing and circumstance and situation every one said would never be.

This is your Magnum Opus. Your greatest life's work. Your masterpiece.

The very thing you thought was going to be the end of you, because you didn't know or understand
the magnitude of it all.

Macey Mclain.

You are my Magnum Opus. My greatest life's work, by His grace alone.

You are the gift that came to me twenty two years ago, today, at 2:52 p.m. and the only child I've ever given birth to who smiled at me the second they placed you in my arms.

You are the reason I am standing here today. The gift that came to hold me together, when I should have been holding you together.

Each day that goes by I am humbled that you choose me.
That still, after all these years and after many mistakes, you choose a relationship with your very, young mom who is still having babies and raising babies and caring for babies. While all the other Moms are able to show up at college with car loads of surprises and dinners and tickets and such.
And your Mom is wrangling five children somewhere along the Pampers aisle at Target.

What you may not know or understand or be able to comprehend, is that once God formed you, and perfectly created you, and entrusted you into my arms....

It ruined me forever.

I knew from that very moment, that Motherhood, would be my calling.

That Motherhood would be my gift.

That Motherhood, and newborn babies and toddlers and sweet, bouncing little ones, would be the thing that would cause me to go weak in the knees and I would never be able to return to an upright position again.

You were the one whom God chose to use to teach me so many things.....

You were the one who would become the gift of grace made manifest in my own life.

Thank you baby girl.

I am so incredibly proud of you.

For all that you are. For all that you have become.

For all of the incredible, wonderful, amazing gifts and talents you walk in every day.

For that Pastor's heart you were blessed with from day one.

For the radiant beauty that shines from within you.

I love you and adore you more than you will every know.

Happy Birthday baby girl...... the very best is yet to come.

You are living proof of that.

On my knees with thanksgiving today and every day,

Mama Dukes
Romans 8:18

"Are you awake, Charlotte?" he said softly. "Yes," came the answer.

"What is that nifty little thing?

"Did you make it?" "I did indeed," replied Charlotte in a weak voice.

"Is it a plaything?" "Plaything?" I should say not. It is my egg sac, my magnum opus.

"I don't know what a magnum opus is," said Wilbur.

That's Latin," explained Charlotte. "It means 'great work.'

This egg sac is my great work- the finest thing I have ever made.

~Charlotte's Web

Hotel Information For The Pearl Event II

2011-12-31T12:30:00.001-06:00

You are coming!!!

What a beautiful way to ring in the New Year! I cannot tell you how excited we are!

Have you read that Edie is doing hitch kicks and eating too much fudge over this?

And that Paige is way out of her comfort zone but is about to bust at the seams to meet you all in real life?

I am just beside myself!

Can you believe that we are just 69 days away?!!

I can hardly wait for hugging and squealing with a bunch of real life "Steel Magnolias"right there in the middle of that Magnolia Ballroom!!

If you want to squeal and hug and wear pearls and talk about Jesus with us that day then you can get your ticket here for $25.00.

Seating is limited!

www.http://thepearlevent-esearch.eventbrite.com/?srnk=1

Hotel Information:

Opryland Hotel has offered a discounted rate for Friday night, March 9, 2012 of $144.00

Gaylord Opryland Hotel & Convention Center
2800 Opryland Drive
Nashville, TN 37214

1-888-777-6779

When you call in you will need to use this discount code. X-PEARL

This does not include the taxes and the 15.00 resort fee they apply to all rooms for the use of their many facilities.

They have also offered a discount on self parking of 10.00 per day.
I will have more information about parking instructions once we get closer to the date of the event.

(I did try to get a discount for a weekend package but the hotel is already close to sold out for Saturday night due to a huge event there that day.) There are still some rooms available. It will just be a higher rate if you want to stay Saturday night as well.

I requested a small amount of rooms to be blocked off to start. I can ask for a few more more once this block has been sold. Please let me know as soon as possible if you call and the rooms are sold out at that price and you would like to stay there.

Check In starts at 3:00 that Friday afternoon and Check Out is 11:00 a.m. on Saturday morning.

Here are two other hotel options that are literally right down the street from Opryland Hotel.

The Hampton Inn Nashville/Opryland~ $149.00 a night for a standard room (plus tax)

Free Parking . Free Breakfast. Free Internet.

230 Rudy Circle
Nashville, TN 37214

1-615-620-2500

Check In is after 4:00 p.m. and Check Out is at 11:00

Hyatt Place Nashville/Opryland~ $129.00 a night for a standard room ( plus tax)

Free Parking. Free Breakfast. Free Internet.

220 Rudy Circle
Nashville, TN 37214

615-872-0422

Check In is after 3:00 p.m. and Check Out is at 12:00

Lastly, I have created a page on Facebook about the event and will be adding to it often.

You can join and connect with others who will be attending and talk about hotels and restaurants and
which strand of pearls to wear among other things!

You can find that page here:

https://www.facebook.com/events/154366354668098/

I hope that this helps in the making of your plans! Cannot wait to meet every, single one of you!!

Happy New Year!!

Merry Christmas 2011

2011-12-25T21:32:00.002-06:00

Source found here

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift! 2 Corinthians 9:15

Just wanted to pop in and wish you all a very merry Christmas....

I also wanted to let you know how much you are appreciated!

You mean so much to me and I thank you for allowing me the privilege to pour out the pieces on the pages of this blog.

It has been a tremendous gift ....

I hope you all are enjoying the sweet moments today... It has been a special Christmas for us with Daddy being home for good. We are stepping over piles of laundry, Legos and naked Barbies and the last time I checked several dinosaurs were riding around on the Wonder Pets boat.

Gracious me.

Loving every minute of it.

Merry Christmas to you beautiful friends....

You Are Not Alone

2011-12-21T09:37:00.001-06:00

In all of its glory and all of its pageantry and all of its goodness and as wonderful as it can be....

For many, Christmas is a painful reminder. It arrives with unbearable grief.

It can knock the breath out of us for a number of reasons.

And our minds can know with all knowing that He is the reason for the season and it is to be celebrated.

But our hearts can be in another place.

Our hearts can bring up the end of the race some days, weeks and months later.

And sometimes our hearts just can't compete at all .

For many, Christmas is something that we have to just "get through" and cannot wait for it to be over.

It isn't because we do not love others or because we do not understand the reason we celebrate at all...

It is just for the simple reason that for many, Christmas hurts.

My beautiful friend Granny Smith Green , whom we all know and love so much, lost her Father last year this very week. And in all the joy and all the rejoicing of the birth of our Savior and in all head knowledge that this is truly the most wonderful time of the year...

There is sorrow.

A place in our hearts that rings with unbearable grief and a place at the table, empty this year.

A position in a precious family that can never be replaced.

In speaking with her this week, I heard what grace truly sounds like. Beautiful, unmeasurable, grace.

So many of us are walking through changes this year that are not what we would have scripted for our life.

So many are trying to find a new normal and start over and begin again and for thousands and thousands of beautiful hearts, this will be their very first Christmas alone.

Because as incredible and wonderful as life can be....

Death comes. Sorrow comes. Divorce comes. Separation and heartbreak come. Saying goodbye to babies you never had the chance to raise, comes. Financial despair and job loss comes. Cancer and sickness and illness comes.....

It wasn't in the script or the journal or the plans.....

But it comes.

And for many, this will be a Christmas of trying to feel our way around in the dark, broken places of our heart while at the same time trying to sit up straight in the church pew and hear the gospel about the One who came to mend every broken place.

So many are trying to buy gifts and give and love and sow and bless and do for others and on the inside they can barely stand.

Many are trying to explain to wide eyed children why there will not be very, many gifts under the tree this year. Or worse, anything at all.

Unbearable pain in the midst of such a glorious season.

And the One who is the Author and the Finisher. The Beginning and the End. The Alpha and the Omega.....

He is calling the broken and the mended in every single one of us to reach out to the broken places in someone else this Christmas.

To be His hands and His feet. To be His mouthpiece. To hold the pen to paper and write His words to the heart of another. To be an earthly demonstration of His love to someone else this season, to remind a broken heart that they are not alone this Christmas.

That He is ever mindful of them...

You are not alone sweet reader.

He is there with you.

In the midst of court hearings and proceedings. In the midst of that hospital room.

He is there in the intensive care unit.

He is hovering over you in the midst of the separation and divorce.

He knows how difficult it is to begin life as a single parent.....

He is going before you, even now and preparing the way and orchestrating every need on your behalf....

Even this Christmas.

May we each receive the gift that is demonstrating the love of the Father to someone else this year.....

Be still and know that I am God. ~ Psalm 46:10.

A Father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, Is God in His holy habitation.
God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity. ~ Psalm 68: 5-6

Hear me, O Lord, for Your lovingkindness is good; Turn to me according to the multitude of your tender mercies. And do not hide Your face from your servant, For I am in trouble; Hear me speedily.
Draw near to my soul and redeem it; Deliver me because of my enemies. ~ Psalm 69: 16-18

Bless the Lord, O my soul;
And all that is within me, bless His holy name!
Bless the Lord, O my soul,
And forget not all His benefits:
Who forgives all your iniquities,
Who heals all your diseases,
Who redeems your life from destruction,
Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies,
Who satisfies your mouth with good things,
So that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. ~ Psalm 103: 1-5

Gifts Without Ribbons

2011-12-19T10:16:00.000-06:00

Gifts without ribbons.

Gifts that come in the midnight hour when there isn't a single sound except the tiny puffs of air on your neck from the breath of your newborn baby.

Gifts that come in the wee hours of the morning when chubby, little hands make there way around yours.

Gifts that come in the moments between laundry and diaper changing and bathing five babies every night.

Gifts that come when the entire Christmas tree falls over because your three year old decided to launch himself right into it.....

Moments that become gifts ........without ribbons or packaging or string.

Gifts handed to us by the One who is the giver of every good thing.

The One who knows the deepest desire of our hearts...who knows every, single need.

Gifts that come when all things have lost there relevance.

This year I received the most incredible gift...

It didn't come like I had hoped or expected. But it came.

A gift without ribbons....

He's home.

Finally.

Glory to His precious name.

The man to whom my heart belongs is home.

The father of my children is home.

The man who is the rock of this family and who is the hardest worker and the best provider I have ever known. He's home.

The man who gives and sows and loves and demonstrates the love of the Father unlike anyone else I know. He's home.

The man who has spent the last two years and four months living and working in another state and has only been home on the weekends, and many, many times it was not every weekend.

He's home.

I can attempt to describe the gratitude.

I can attempt to describe the level of overwhelming joy and thanksgiving.....

But I think my words would fail in comparison to what I feel has taken place in my heart.

I am beside myself.....

It's over.

The commuting. The struggling. The single parenting of five children.

The sleepless nights. The weight and the burden of trying to do it all by myself without an ounce of help.

The going to every school function and event and open house alone.

The trying to parent and have a marriage and relationship long distance.

It's over.

And he is never going back.

It will mean big changes for our family.

Some of which we have already been walking through the last month.

Changes that would send some people into a complete and total tailspin.

But only a wife who has prayed countless prayers for years to be reunited with her husband no matter what ~ could say it matters not financially......I'm just so thankful he is home.

It may not be a Malibu Barbie Dream House Christmas this year.

But it is the Christmas that my heart sang and my feet danced and my prayers were answered.

It is the Christmas that will not involve going to the airport for any reason.

It is the Christmas that I have never, ever seen my children so incredibly happy.

It is the Christmas that I feel like June Cleaver and I am twirling around in my apron .....

It is the Christmas that six babies and my husband under the same roof mean more to me than anything in the entire world.

The gift I had hoped and prayed would come.

The one without ribbons and wrapping and string.

The one that has made my heart absolutely soar and sing.

My children are finally in the arms of their Father,

and we have waited and prayed for years for this day...

No words big enough sweet friends.

Soli Dio Gloria. To God alone be the glory......

A Few Details About The Pearl Event II

2011-12-14T18:23:00.002-06:00

Hello Sweet Readers!

Thank you all so much for your enthusiasm about the upcoming event! We are so looking forward
to this special day as well as the chance to meet and spend some time with each one of you!

Here are just a few more details that might be helpful and answer some questions you may have asked or may have wanted to ask!

Hotel Rooms:

We will be offering a block of discounted rooms at The Opryland Hotel and were waiting to see exactly how many (I've asked for more than they usually offer) before announcing that information.

There are many other hotels that we can suggest and will be offering that list here on the blog as well as on the ticket page.

Schedule:

Here is a tentative schedule and it is subject to change! This is just to give you a little bit of an idea!

This is my first experience hosting an event with other speakers (and I am so excited about it! ) Last time it was just me speaking, so please bear with me a little bit...my apologies!

9:00-9:30- Praise and Worship (TBA) and Welcome (Sibi )

9:30-10:15- First Speaker - Sarah Cantrell- Personal Testimony

10:30--11:15- Second Speaker- Jane Mathews- Personal Testimony

11:15- 12:00- Third Speaker- Paige Knudsen- Personal Testimony

12:00-1:00- Lunch - (on your own in the hotel unless my prayers get answered with sponsors! :)

1:00- 1:45- Fourth Speaker- Edie Wadsworth- Personal Testimony

1:45-2:45 - Fifth Speaker- Sibi- Pearl Teaching and Personal Testimony

2:45-3:15- Special video and the placing of pearl necklaces on each of the women (The speakers and some special "Pearl Girls" will be the ones adorning you all with necklaces)

3:15-4:00- Opportunities for prayer and meeting and hugging and possible squealing :) and encouraging!!

What kind of event is this?

This is a Christian event. It is not affiliated with a specific church or denomination.

All are welcome! We would LOVE for you to attend!

We are all Christians. We all love the same Jesus.
We all have testimonies that many of you may be able to identify with in one way or another!

We are not "perfectly polished" speakers....We are Mamas who love Jesus and love our families and want to share our testimonies to offer hope and encouragement and hopefully, by His grace, point others to a deeper relationship with Him.

How large/small is the event and venue?

We are offering room for 200 seats.

If there is interest past this, we will have a waiting list that will pop up on Eventbrite once the last ticket is sold and will work out the details accordingly.

We have already had ticket sales and are so humbled and honored and excited that you are coming!!!

Thank you!!

I will share more information soon! Including a detailed list of shops, and restaurants , etc and wonderful things about the area for those of you who want to make a weekend out of it!

Sponsoring the event:

If you would like to make a donation of any amount to help with the event you can do so through the
Pay Pal link on the ticket page.

If you are interested in partnering with us through a sponsorship, please email me at :
pearlsandgrace@yahoo.com

Roommates and connecting with other attendees:

If you would like to connect with a possible roommate or find out who all is planning to attend you can do that by sending out a tweet on Twitter and using the hashtag #thepearlevent.

Blog buttons about the event will be coming after Christmas!

I hope this helps to answer some of your questions. Thank you all for your support and encouragement!

Please keep His upcoming event in your prayers!

The Pearl Event II ~ The Double Strand

2011-12-12T03:05:00.002-06:00

I'm writing with a big smile this morning...

With complete awe and wonder and excitement....

It is with an overwhelming joy that I get to type these words and share this news with you today!

The Pearl Event II~ The Double Strand

Saturday, March 10, 2012

9:00 ~ 4:00

The Opryland Hotel

Magnolia Ballroom

Nashville, Tennessee

Can I tell you the best part?

Amazing women are coming to share their hearts and their testimonies with us!!

Like this incredible woman.....

Please try and remain calm........

Paige Knudsen of Simple Thoughts!!!

I'm pretty sure I squealed for three days straight when she said "Yes!"

I have such a heart connection with this precious woman and I am so honored that she is allowing the Lord to use her as His vessel for the upcoming Pearl Event!

In addition to raising four, beautiful daughters. In addition to being the wife to amazing Dan!! In addition to having the most gorgeous home that has been featured all over the place....

She loves the Lord and has a powerful testimony of His goodness and His faithfulness....

A little about Paige:

Paige Knudsen is the author of the inspiring blog titled Simple Thoughts, where she shares her heart and life as a Mother of four daughters and Wife to one wonderful Dan.

She also shares her heart for the Lord and the lessons he has been teaching her from the time she was a little girl. Paige grew up in a loving , Christian home and learned

as a young Mother than she was truly in the palm of His hand.

Paige has walked through deep things with our Father including the passing of her young, athletic Husband due to cancer, leaving her with three, young daughters all under the age of three to raise alone.

She often shares how the Lord has been faithful to keep His promises as a few years later she fell in love and married another Godly man and was blessed with another daughter.

Having recently sent her first born off to college, she continues to grow and stretch within the loving arms of her Savior.

Paige is known for her gift of authenticity as well as her willingness to praise God through every chapter of the story He is writing in her life.

And guess who else?

Please do not pass out in the reading of this blog post......

Edie Wadsworth of Life in Grace!

(An episode of fainting may have taken place when she said "Yes!")

She is such a gift....we all love her!

This woman who lost her entire home to a fire just last Christmas....

This woman who has shared her moments of sorrow and her joy as well as her tremendous love for Him through it all....

A little about Edie:

My name is Edie Wadsworth and I am a good Southern mama to four wonderful children and I am crazy over my husband, Martin Luther, C.S Lewis, theology books, lip gloss, cowboy boots, lamps, vintage dishes, butter and doilies. I am a (Lutheran) christian blogger at life{in}grace where I try to cherish the sacred grace moments that spring up among the stony ground of everyday living. Like most weary travelers, I am no stranger to sorrow and I’m still learning that all of life is God’s gift---every single circumstance. It’s all grace. I practiced medicine for 5 years and quit to stay home with my children. That led to homeschooling 2 of those sweet babies which led to locking myself in my bathroom one Monday and sobbing for two hours uncontrollably. Four years later, I’m discovering Jesus’ words----- that ‘laying down one’s life’ is truly the only way to find it. And yet….. sometimes those crosses seem difficult to bear. So, I cling to Christ---in whose cross we have been reconciled to our Father and in whose mercy and grace we can finally rest. And I guess I might as well tell you up front: I love Loretta Lynn too. Amen.

And some of you may remember a post here recently titled "The Unraveling"......

Written about this precious friend of mine, Sarah Cantrell, who recently kissed her twin boys goodbye at just twenty weeks of pregnancy.

She has a beautiful story of the Father's love in the midst of such tremendous loss....you can read a little more about Sarah and her story here.

I know there are so many women who have walked this path in life and He will be there to meet you through this heart overflowing with compassion. She is absolutely amazing and has become someone very special to me. I am so honored that she would partner with me for this event.

A little about Sarah:

Sarah Cantrell is the Mother of two precious babies on this side of Heaven and two babies on the other.
She is the wife of a wonderful man and an absolute lover of Jesus and His people. Sarah's testimony of faith in the tragic loss of her twin boys has allowed her the opportunity to communicate the love of Jesus through her story. The story of His unfailing, lavishing love, comfort and redemption. In her spare time she is actively involved in her community, enjoys the role of a party planner and loves spending time with her family and friends.

And I am excited to introduce you all to a very special friend of mine, Jane Mathews, whom I have known for close to twenty years! She will be sharing with us as well!

Jane has a powerful testimony that will minister to many hearts on many different levels. She is real and true and genuine and sincere and you will be blessed by the magnitude of His love that she carries.

A little about Jane:

Jane Mathews is a single mom, to her amazing fifteen year old son. She is often found in the neighborhood high school football or basketball stands with a video recorder in hand yelling
"Get the ball!" She has just recently learned with difficulty how to "let go" of her adult son to
find a life of his own.

Jane works for an international Christian ministry as a prayer counselor and serves on the prophetic team at her local church.

As a teen, Jane suffered the loss of her Father and brother as a result of her parent's divorce. She began seeking to replace those relationships, which only led to more loss, abandonment and pain. As God began to draw her to the person of Jesus, she began to find hope, true love and peace like she had never known. She has discovered that any mistake, no matter how great, can be covered by the arms of a loving Savior.

Jane delights in seeing others find their true love and the realization of how deeply they are loved, regardless of their circumstances. Through a life of brokenness, she understands the words "He who has been forgiven much, loves much." Her desire is to "love much" and help others find freedom to do so as well. She holds on to the hope of restoration in her own life, and is passionate about helping others to find the same in theirs.

Jane shares her testimony for the purpose of others finding hope, encouragement, and strength for their own life, and to give glory to the One who has shown her the way.

Can I tell you how excited I am?

No words big enough......

I will be sharing pieces of my testimony as well, but more importantly, these vessels of oil I just mentioned are going to be blessing each one of us in very special ways that weekend.

There will be more information to come and more details as we get closer to the date!

But for now, you can register and purchase tickets here:

http://thepearlevent.eventbrite.com/

Thank you so much for your love, support, prayers and patience as we have waited almost three years for the second Pearl Event to take place!

May He be glorified!

Thanksgiving Is A Place {2011 Edition}

2011-11-16T18:41:00.002-06:00

This is a repost of my Thanksgiving post from last year.

It is the exact same way that I feel this Thanksgiving ~ only deeper.

So I thought it would be fitting to post it once again.......

After the year we have had I've found myself this November filled with gratitude on a new level.

And it doesn't have anything to do with turkey and cornbread dressing.

It doesn't have anything to do with Black Friday .

And really nothing at all to do with rushing the next Holiday and attempting to get the tree up and decorated.

For me this year, Thanksgiving is a place.

It's a spiritual posture that I can walk in every, single day.

Or not.

I don't need a big meal this year, where folks eat too much and then pass out for the rest of the day to prove how thankful I am.

I want to be as thankful on a regular Monday as I am on actual Thanksgiving.

I love the Holidays.

I mean, I absolutely adore them. But this year it's so different for me.

I've arrived at my destination and it's called Thanksgiving.

Where gratitude and attitude are the state and capital.

It is a place. And I'm resting in it this year.

Knowing that the Father doesn't need me to host, cook or create a huge meal.

Knowing that He is interested in the condition of my heart and what's going on inside it more than how pretty the table is set or how good the pumpkin pie is going to be.

It isn't just a day for me this year.

It is a place and I never want to leave.

No matter what happens in life. This is where I am taking up my permanent residence.

I want to rest in this place whether God provides simple daily "manna" or whether it's a year flowing with milk and honey. I have to. I've had to walk through many valleys so that I can teach my children what Thanksgiving really means out of a true and deep heart knowledge.

Not just head knowledge.

And I've always been thankful. But this year, it's on an entirely different level.

It's a place inside that even though everything is not perfect....

It's okay.

And even though things can be really difficult and really hard at times...

It's okay.

And even though God has allowed certain circumstances and situations that are pressing and crushing...

It's okay.

I will praise Him and thank Him and trust Him in the midst of it all.

Because my heart has a new address this year......

2011 Thanksgiving Circle.

Love And Pearls

2011-11-15T16:23:00.000-06:00

Four years ago today I took a leap of faith and wrote my very first blog post.

I wasn't an expert. But I felt led.

I didn't know a million things about the blog world. But I felt a pull.

I didn't know a single soul in real life who blogged or a single soul in the blog world. But I felt prompted.

There were no pictures with that very first post. Only words.

These words.....

Nov. 15, 2007

An Attitude of Gratitude... I am thankful that God is so ever mindful of you and of me. My cup runneth over with gratitude as I sit in all humility and pour out from my heart about all that He has done in my life and the lives of those I love so much. My prayer is that it would inspire you, that it would stir you and that it would point you into a real relationship with the one who created you. Let this day be the beginning of something beautiful...

I can remember thinking to myself

Lord, I don't know what you are doing but if only one person reads this blog I pray that it blesses them.

I wanted it to be a place of blessing.

A place of encouragement.

A place that would point you to Him.

And in the process so many of you have been an encouragement to me over the years.

Thank you.

Thank you to each and every one of you who have taken the time to visit, to read, to comment, to email...

Thank you to each and every one of you who have shared your own journey with me.

What a privilege to be trusted with the pieces.

Thank you for allowing me the space to share my own pieces as well....both healed and broken.

I have counted the pages here as one of my greatest joys in life.

To be connected with each one of you.

To write.

To pray.

To encourage.

To share.

To listen......

And for that I am forever grateful.....

No Comparison

2011-11-11T13:44:00.000-06:00

Comparison.

That thing that can tie us up in a bind and cause us to feel less than who He has created us to be.

That thing that causes us to shrink back, hold back and look back.

Invisible emotional and mental chains that bind us and paralyze us from walking with purpose.

It will keep us entangled.

And if we camp out in a state of comparison we dismiss who God created us to be.

We dismiss and miss all of the beautiful things in our own life.

Because when we are busy comparing, looking, measuring our own life up against someone else's
we will come up short every time.

The enemy is just waiting to whisper....you are not enough.

And He uses the tool of comparison to convince us of this lie.

Comparison ruins moments and events.

It ruins friendships.

It comes to tear down and destroy.

It breeds jealousy and insecurity and competition.

It will absolutely destroy the spirit of the living God in us if we allow it.

Comparison will talk us right out of the amazing life we've been given.

Comparison creeps into our hearts and minds and can convince us that every one else has it better. And then before we know it, we have pulled away from friendships with those whom we seem to feel "less than" around in life.

Or worse.

We never took the time to get to know someone at all.......

On the night before the first day of school this year I sat with my 8 year old and my 6 year old. I wanted them to know how much He loves them and how unique and special they both are. I also wanted to encourage them not to fall into comparison with others.

So I bought a pink measuring tape for her and a ruler for him and used it to demonstrate.

I then wrote on a separate piece of paper the following scripture and attached it to the measuring tape and then also wrote the same scripture on the back of the ruler.

"That Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height - to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God." Ephesians 4:17-19.

I wanted them to have a tangible reminder ....

When we know in our hearts this incredible truth the lie of comparison loses all power.

To this day they each still carry the measuring tape and ruler in their backpacks.

I want my children to know early on the misery that comes when we open that door......

Maybe because I spent the first ten years of my oldest daughter's life as a single mother comparing myself to all the married moms.

In my early twenties with a baby on my hip I used to think... once I get married......

THEN I will be happy and whole just like everyone else.

Then I will be equal.

Then I will be accepted.

What a lie.

Happiness is a heart song.

Wholeness, contentment and security are impossible apart from Him.

Whether we are married or single....

Once I was married comparison creeped into my life in new ways.

The Lord begin to speak to my heart on many levels and teach me about contentment and acceptance.

He did not create me to be like everyone else or to "fit in" with everyone else.

He created me to fit with Him.

He had to teach me not to resent my testimony. (That was a hard lesson.)

He had to teach me not to compare. (Harder still.)

Our testimonies are uniquely ours and the story He is writing in each one of us is to be embraced.

It is for our good and His glory......

So this weekend while you are busy with your blessings and your beautiful life.

I want to encourage you to stop into Target.

Go to the sewing aisle and pick up one pretty, pink measuring tape.

Take a bright marker and write across it over and over again.

There is no comparison.

There is no comparison.

There is no comparison.

Keep it with you at all times so that when comparison tries to creep in, you can shut it down.

Keep it with you until this truth is so saturated into your spirit you no longer need to look at it.

Because sweet friends...........

Nothing compares to His love for you.

Nothing compares to the way He created you.

Nothing compares to what He has called you to do in this life.

Nothing compares to your purpose and destiny.

Nothing compares to the magnitude of what He has set aside just for you.

Nothing compares to the fullness of His goodness and His graciousness toward you.

Nothing compares to His mercies toward you. To the depth of His forgiveness toward you.

Nothing compares to what He has in store for you.

Nothing compares to the spouse he is going to bless you with.

Nothing compares to the babies He is is going to entrust to you.

Nothing compares to the increase, the goodness and the blessings that are yours and yours alone.

Nothing compares to the way you walk and talk and look and laugh and think and create.

There isn't anyone like you in all of the world.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Knit together by the Creator in pure and total perfection....

May these truths settle down deep inside your heart and take root in your life in the most amazing ways and may you be ever mindful of the width and depth and length and height of His love for you.

Thank you to my beautiful friend Ashley for taking the time to hold my own personal pink measuring tapes and allowing me to photograph her for this blog post.

No one compares to you Ashley and to the many incredible gifts He has given you....

Beautiful. Compassionate. True. Genuine. Sincere. Refined. Redeemed. Renewed and Healed are you my wonderful friend.

Thank you for your love and friendship.....

Fall Goodies

2011-11-09T11:15:00.000-06:00

Good Morning!

I hope you all are enjoying this incredible time of year! I love, love, love fall!
I wanted to share a few of my fall favorites with you all. I do not normally do a post like this but thought I would branch out and write about some fragrant and delicious goodies today. I love all things home and especially anything seasonal!

Here are some of my personal favorites! You may notice that I have an unhealthy obsession for all things Williams and Sonoma:) I squeal with delight every single time I walk into that store!

Throw out everything else. It's over. I can't stop cleaning with this!!
Williams Sonoma Winter Berry dish soap, countertop spray and hand soap.

The nutmeg grinder! I have used this in my coffee for years! So good....

Cinnamon Stirrers and Mulling Spices. Another two of my all time favorites! I burn small amounts of the mulling spices on the stove and my entire house smells like WS within minutes. I give these away as gifts a lot during the holidays!

This is the most fragrant fall candle I have found this year. It smells like caramel cake (which I will get to in a minute) and pumpkin muffins combined! Found at Bath and Body Works.

The Honeycrisp apple.

It is like eating a dessert! So good and so good for you. My favorite treat this time of year! You can find them at Whole Foods and Trader Joe's.

My apologies for this tiny picture!! This is my all time favorite coffee ever. It is called Caramel Apple Nut . They only carry it this time of year! It is from Gloria Jean's Coffee and it will make you weak in the knees. I promise!

This is a close second! Also from Gloria Jean's. It makes my entire kitchen smell like a blueberry muffin bakery!

My favorite cup and saucer from Anthro.

Caramel Cake. That is all. My weakness this time of year! This one is from Caroline's Cakes which I have heard wonderful things about! I have my eye on this one to order for Thanksgiving.

This is my absolute favorite candle for the Christmas season. Nest "Holiday." I have been a "Nest" candle fan for years! All of their candles are incredible but this one is my personal favorite!

Hope you enjoy and my apologies for the size of some of the pictures! Happy Fall!

The Unraveling

2011-11-02T13:13:00.002-05:00

Sarah and Jonathan

A turn of events have happened recently that have written things on my heart that I never expected.

Pieces of life that have now become part of my testimony.

Pieces of life that have unraveled me.

Sometimes He allows the unraveling when we least expect it.

I am one who likes ribbons and bows and packages all tied up with beautiful satin...

I like life packaged up all pretty.

But there is One who unravels.....

Who will cause us to come undone in the deep places.

Who unties in order to bring the breaking forth.....to bring the increase.

Because in the breaking process He can have His way.

There are times when the breaking, the unraveling, is almost unbearable.

And during these times we have the opportunity to offer up a sacrifice of praise.....

My beautiful friend Sarah is such an example.....

She is all kinds of amazing in every possible way and her heart overflows with the love of Christ.

She just lost her precious identical twin boys at 20 weeks of pregnancy.

I have had the honor of listening to my special friend share her experience. I have heard the devastation, the sorrow and the praise unto Him in the midst of it all.

I heard the sacrifice of praise.

I heard the unraveling.....

The sound alone will cause you to come apart at the seams...

I want God to piece it all back together and I want those babies back in the arms of their Mother and Father who love them so much. I want their sorrow to turn to joy and their home to be filled with the four children they were planning on bringing up in the admonition of the Lord.

But God.

Sometimes He has a different plan.

Sometimes the breaking forth, the process, the undoing of our soul doesn't happen on Sunday morning sitting in a church pew.

Or in Sunday school.

Or while we are signing up for a missions opportunity.

I would say it rarely does.

It most likely happens in the midnight hour when we are alone with Him and there are circumstances and situations that have brought us to our knees.

It happens on a Tuesday, October 11 at 8:30 p.m. in the middle of a hospital room when you have to kiss your beloved twin boys goodbye .

John Wilson and David Casswell....

Twenty weeks of love.

Sweet Jesus.

"6 ounces and 11 ounces of sheer beauty. Perfect identical faces and every part totally whole."

Sometimes it happens in spite of the fact that you have made a space and a place in your home and your heart for two incredible gifts all the while giving God the glory.

Unraveled.

Unbearable grief.

Our hearts are broken for this precious family.

There is a depth of sorrow and despair in life that at times we can share openly, allowing others the opportunity to be His hands and feet. We can make ourselves available to receive an outpouring of love and support that one never imagined was possible.

And then there are times that we walk through grief, sorrow, loss and despair that cannot be shared and it can sometimes seem that we are walking through it completely alone.

We cannot compare pain or sorrow.

But I want to encourage you if you are walking through the unraveling at all....

Either public or private.

If you are experiencing grief or sorrow in any form, He is there with you right now in spite of it all.

He is with you in the midnight hour and when life falls apart and it seems there isn't a soul you can trust.

If you are one who has lost in life in unimaginable ways, I want to encourage you that there is One who comforts unlike anyone else.

I want to encourage you if this is you right now, you do not have to walk through it alone. He will meet you right where you are and pour out an overwhelming healing love.

Just call on His name....

I promise you He will answer. Your names are written on the palm of His hand and He is ever mindful of you and yours.....

For Sarah....

Thank you for allowing me the honor to share pieces of your story.....

May the One who has called you to this place in life pour out His peace and comfort that surpasses all understanding and may He offer the Comforter, the sweet Holy Spirit, to you in the most beautiful ways. May you know the width and depth of His love on a new level through this difficult time my sweet friend. May He bring about a recompense that cannot be measured and may the gift of your precious sons bring about much fruit. You are a woman after His own heart Sarah. You are a woman who fears the Lord and who has been an earthly demonstration of His love to many.

I pray that every good and perfect gift be released for you and your family, pressed down, shaken together and overflowing in the days and weeks to come.

May He be glorified.

Love and Miracles to you my precious friend....

"But you Israel, are my servant, Jacob whom I have chosen, the descendants of Abraham My friend.
You whom I have taken from the ends of the earth, and called from it's farthest regions, and said to you, You are my servant. I have chosen you and have not cast you away;
Fear not, For I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous hand. " Isaiah 41: 8-10

Sigma Alpha Omega

2011-10-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

Good Morning Girls,

I just wanted to touch base with you all bright and early before the rush starts!

I wanted to let you know that I have finally responded to all of your comments in the Empty Corners post!

Thank you to each and every one of you who took the time to read, comment and share about "J!"

She is such an inspiration to me and I was so overwhelmed that so many of you wanted to bless her.

If you left your email in the comments, etc. I just sent out a big email to all of you this morning with all of the information. My apologies that it took a few days! We have had a few life changes going on over here!

Thank you so much for being an earthly demonstration of His love!

In other news I just have to share these pictures that a reader sent to me last week and say how impressed I was with this Christian Sorority!

May I introduce you to Sigma Alpha Omega.....

Brittany Michelle Hughes sent this to me last week! Thank you Brittany!

"We are Sigma Alpha Omega, a Christian Sorority at University of North Carolina at Wilmington and we just rushed 33 new "baby doves" that will begin the process of becoming a sister! We cannot wait to encourage their walk with Christ and to have fun! "

"This is several of our Sigma Alpha Omega Sisters and the "Baby Doves"! Our sorority calls the Sisters "doves" as a reference to Matthew 3:16-17! After the "baby doves" we are 75 strong on our campus!"

"This is our 33 new "baby doves" and the two Sigma Alpha Omega sisters who are the "dove mommies" who take their job very seriously! What a blessing to have 33 women of God excited and encouraged to be a light on campus!"

Can we talk about how incredible this is? And the name?!!

Sigma Alpha Omega. He is the beginning and the end.

How I love this!!

I am so excited for these girls!! What a blessing to have this group of women surrounding you and supporting you during your college years and with Christ as the center of it all!

Aren't they gorgeous?!

Keep using your "glory gifts" for Him girls!

So proud of you all!

Thank you so much Brittany for sharing this with me!

Missing My Girl

2011-10-11T16:15:00.000-05:00

Just missing my girl today....It's hard once they are grown and although you love watching them fly there are days when you long for them to be little again too.

I love this picture of Macey with Pearl at the pumpkin patch last year.

Just loving on her baby sister.

It is such a picture of how she loves. Big and true and with such purity of heart....

Wish you were here to sit on my lap baby girl.

Missing you something awful.....

This Time Of Year

2011-10-09T04:10:00.001-05:00

It's here! It is the time of year when I breathe deeper and do my best to relish and revel in every moment of the day. It's when I normally bake my favorite muffins and buy way too many pumpkins. I am a seasonal girl! It is also when we spend time as a family taking long walks around the park and the lake with strollers and our little, red wagon.

We also love to sip and spill some warm apple cider :)

I cannot get enough of fall. The fragrance alone is enough to send me right over the edge!

Nutmeg anyone?

Freshly ground over a cup of hot coffee or a bowl of homemade macaroni and cheese.

Beyond.

It is also "field day" time with my camera.

I want to remember every. single. thing.

I pray that I don't forget.

I want to remember what their tiny fingers look like trying to hold a pumpkin.

And what the back of their sweet, little heads look like riding in the wagon.

The sound of their voices. Their cries. Their laughter.

The way they interact with each other. The giggles. The tears. The wild and the exhausting.

The tug of war, the disagreements, the lessons of learning to prefer one another...

Fall also brings change....

This week starts some difficult changes for our family. I am praying for the ability to walk through it all with a special grace and no matter what, I am reminded today to capture it all....

I want to photograph every season of life.

Happy Sunday to you.

May your day be filled with beautiful moments....

Empty Corners

2011-10-05T12:27:00.003-05:00

This story I am about to offer is shared with full permission by one incredible and brave young woman.

Some people get excited over sports, concerts, a special vacation.

And for others it's a new bag. A new pair of shoes. A pretty lipstick.

And while all of those things are wonderful and of course can make one happy, I happen to get really excited over an empty corner and let's not forget my obsession with newborn babies as well.

But I especially love an empty corner.

It may sound strange to some people.

Most people may not even notice it during their daily commute.

But for whatever reason God made me to notice the details.

Here is an example...

At the beginning of the summer we were driving down a beautiful street with all of the babies in tow and there before my eyes was a beautiful, vibrant, young woman.

She was standing on the corner. The one that was supposed to be empty.

And she was expecting.

She wasn't expecting a bus. Or a taxi. Or a friend to pick her up from work.

She was expecting a baby......... Remember my obsession?

Now there are two things I am not going to put up with in life.

One is a woman standing on a corner that should be empty and two is that same woman standing there expecting her first born gift.

I pretty much had a panic attack and my husband knew what was about to happen.

I had to talk to her. I had to meet her. I had to help in some way.

It was beyond me. It was all Him.

It didn't have anything to do with me. And everything to do with a Daddy who wanted to reach His daughter and pour out love and mercy and goodness and grace and meet every single need she had.

I asked her the most important thing first.

"Are you safe?" She looked at me and smiled and slowly nodded.

But I've lived long enough to know that a simple smile and slow nod don't mean a thing.

She wasn't and I knew it. I could feel it.

And she wouldn't be standing on a corner selling the homeless paper to folks if she was.

I asked her name ....

I asked her what she needed. She wouldn't really tell me.

I asked her if she had a place and she gave me that simple smile and a slow nod one more time.

I just wanted to meet a need. Even just one.

I didn't want to interrogate her. I didn't want to question her. I didn't need to know all the details. There wasn't an ounce of judgement in my heart. I just wanted her off of that corner and safe in a place of her own getting herself ready to become a mother.

And so that is how it began......

I came home and tried to figure out how to reach her , how to connect, how to help.

I posted a note on FB telling everyone whom I was connected with that there was

"An opportunity to demonstrate His love standing on the corner" and gave the address.

I bagged up almost all of my maternity clothes and put them in the car to give to her.

I talked with my husband , I begged him to let her live with us. I talked about her and talked about her
to try and figure out what to do.

And then it was like she disappeared.

I would drive by, many times, and she would not be standing there.

Then one afternoon, my friend Vanessa texted me and said "Sibi, she's there today!"

It was the week we were leaving to go on vacation, my husband just so happened to be home and the 12 passenger van we rented needed to be picked up earlier than we actually needed it. By a couple of days.

God is in the details!!!

As soon I received that text I told my husband and we loaded up all five children and wheeled out of the driveway to go and rescue this precious woman. We were going to bring her home with us!

It felt like Christmas to me......

By the time we arrived she was gone.

I just knew she had walked down the street to the grocery store to go the bathroom! (9 times pregnant me just knew this !)

We drove around looking and nothing. Looked through the parking lot, nothing. And then I spotted her,
sitting on the lawn furniture under the grocery store awning eating a peach.

I left my husband and children in the car and prayed and asked and hoped and begged the Lord to do the talking.

I talked with her and asked her if she remembered me and hugged her. She said "I remember you, you smell so good. You are the lady who gave me all of those beautiful clothes. You smell just like the clothes you gave me."

I was crying. She was crying.

Because I know what it is to just want something that smells good. That smells clean.

Crying because I know what it is to stand on the corner in life and want......

We all do. We've all stood on the corner in one area of our life or another.

We've stood on the corner of unanswered prayers. And the corner of waiting for our marriages to be restored. We've stood on the corner of financial despair and the street of "Is this all my life is ever going to be?"

I've been there. I've stood there. And many times I watched people drive right on by during some of my darkest hours. Like I was part of the scenery.

I cannot be that person.

The one who doesn't notice. Doesn't see. Doesn't hear. Doesn't feel.

We are all God's children. And we are all called to represent His love to every single soul on this earth.

I said to her, "We came to get you. We want you to live with us. We want to help you. We want to take care of you and your baby."

She was just weeping and sobbing in my arms.

She was so gracious and kind and had such a sweet spirit.

"But why? Why would you want to help me?"

Sometimes life has beat you up so bad, you can't believe anyone even cares, much less wants to help.....

She told me how she had been busy saving her money selling the homeless paper and how just two days prior she had finally found an apartment complex who would work with her and offer her a lease.

Apartment complexes will not rent to someone who is trying to get ahead in life and can pay rent in advance?? They won't rent to someone who doesn't have a current address??

Jesus.

She told me about how the state would not allow her to get food stamps without an address.

Homeless people cannot get food stamps without an address? They are homeless!!!

Jesus.

She told me about the shelter where she had been staying and how cruel they were to her.

"The battered women's shelter? The battered women's shelter is mean to the battered women?"

Jesus.

"They are so mean to us that most women just go back to their abusers"

I. could. not. breathe.

Deep breaths.

Deep breaths

Deep breaths because it was like a holy anger rose up in me. Deep breaths that this woman couldn't get ahead if she tried. Deep breaths because the system doesn't make any sense to me and I don't know if I can fix it but I am going to try even with five babies in tow. Deep breaths because the shelter that should have been her shelter is filled with women who don't know how to help without judging. How to love without hate. Deep breaths because the shelter is not a shelter for the hundreds and thousands of women who are domestic violence victims and who find that the empty corner on a street is a better shelter. Deep breaths because this state that I live in is in the top tier for death to a woman by a DV incident.

Sweet Jesus.

In that moment I knew I could not repair all the damage, all the injustices. I could not undo all the hurt and all the judgement that had been cast her way. I could not create a reenactment of all the people who had just driven by her day after day.....like she was part of the scenery.

This precious child of God carrying another precious child of God overlooked, rejected and cast down.

I hated it all. I was so angry I didn't know what to do.

But He could do something through me and I was willing. My family was willing.

I told her that God was going to deliver a truckload of blessings to her new place.

I asked her what she needed even though I knew it was anything and everything.....

And it was. She had nothing other than a bed for herself.

Within hours of posting about her need on FB, this is what was delivered to my garage for her.

Delivered to my house from about 10 women. Did you know that 10 women can change the world?

I happen to have an incredible neighbor who has some really special friends who gathered, bought and delivered almost everything you see here....

I was blown away by the loved poured out for "J" and her unborn daughter. This is not including the large gift cards and money these precious women offered as well.

Remember the rental van they needed us to take a couple of days early? Free of charge of course.

God had a bigger plan in mind.

Can you imagine waking up one day and having absolutely nothing for yourself. Nothing for your unborn child and hardly a dime to your name?

And then waking up the very next day and God all by Himself decided to send a 12 passenger van to your brand new apartment full of every single thing that you and your sweet baby would need and more.

I was awestruck. The details blew me away.

Awestruck at how the bedding one friend bought was the exact color scheme she wanted.

Overwhelmed at the swing someone gave was the swing she had looked at for months in the store.

Beside myself that the crib and changing table that someone gave matched the highchair someone else gave and was exactly what she really, really wanted.

I'm talking down to the diaper bag.

Every, single thing she needed was provided and was exactly what she wanted or even better than what she had hoped for.

God all by Himself....

Took a homeless pregnant woman standing on the corner and gave her a place of her own and filled it with every single thing she needed and more....supernaturally.

The one detail that I really could not believe and that just blessed me more than I could ever put into words here was the phone call between us while we were driving to deliver everything to her.

I was excited. She was excited. I could hardly wait. She could hardly believe it.....and then she said this...

"Sibi, thank you for giving me the best birthday I've ever had in my life."

Tears....

You mean that God orchestrated Heaven and Earth to give this daughter of His an outpouring of earthly demonstration to show JUST HOW MUCH He loves her and He chose, out of 365 days in the year, to align every, single thing to happen on the anniversary of the day she was born?

God all by Himself.

You know I had to stop and get a cake. :)

Turns out that God loves empty corners even more than I do.

I share this story today to give God every ounce of glory and to thank those who so selflessly gave to help this incredible young woman. Also I wanted to share in hopes that maybe someone reading would be stirred to action the next time that prompting comes when we see a homeless man, woman or child.

That prompting that rises up within us is Him.

Prompting us to stop. To offer. To give. To sow and to demonstrate His love.

We do not know the width or the depth of the stories standing there.

It's not always what we think it is. Things are not always the way they seem.....

And there may be the chance to change the world because we saw a child of God instead of a "situation" standing there.

Thank you to my incredible husband who moved and packed and delivered furniture and things over the course of two days with second degree burns on his hands, and never once complained.

Never once.

You have His heart honey. You teach me by example...

Thank you to my beautiful gift of a girlfriend Vanessa who has been His hands and feet in my own life more times than I can count. Who got the word out and orchestrated and organized with her amazing friends and for that I am truly grateful. Thank you to Benning, Jordan, Janie, Lena, Donna, Ashley, Julie, Shirley and Melissa.

Thank you from the depths of my soul. You all inspire me. You are world changers.....

May He bless you all one hundred fold for your extraordinary kindness.

For "J"....

You are an incredible, amazing, beautiful woman who has yet to even tap into the gifts, talents, purpose and tremendous call that is on your life.

You are also His pearl.......you just haven't discovered it yet. But I see it.

I see in you what you cannot see for yourself.....

The best is yet to come my friend.

Like Honey

2011-10-03T10:16:00.001-05:00

Google Image

Good Morning!

I wanted to share all of the wonderful scriptures you all left in the comments last week here in one post!

So encouraging!

Thank you again for listing some of your favorites and for your kind words....

Like honey to my soul....

Jenny at Hoffman's Hideaway

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Becca at LIFE IS BUT A DREAM

But with that being said, one of my favorite vereses is Psalm 56:8...

You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights, each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.

WORK IN PROGRESS at HOPE SET HIGH

Hosea 2:14-15 Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor (meaning trouble) a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth...

LIZZIE FITZ at MY LIST BECOMES HIS LIST

My favorite verse that has gotten me through on more than one crisis...
The Lord is close to the broken hearted and heals those who are crushed in spirit.

AMY at HAVEN SPACE

Isaiah 40.11... and will gently lead those that have their young. Praying for supernatural strength as you look to the source of all grace this week.

KTG

Hebrews 12:2 Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

HOOTS MAMA

Isaiah 61:3
and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor

DIANE TAYLOR

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."
Lamentations 3:21-24

NEALIE from Big And Biggest

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

LORI from A Time For Everything

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens ~ He has made everything beautiful in it's time" ~
Eccl 3:1-11

Kim from Three Peanuts

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

BETH from Where Ya'll Meets Fixin To

2 Corinthians 12:9
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

Joshua 1:9
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.

And a big thank you to each one of you who took the time to leave the kindest and most encouraging comments ever.......your words mean so much to me!

A man has joy by the answer of his mouth, and a word spoken in due season, how good it is!

~ Proverbs 15:33

Katie at Tale Of A Grits

Heather at Grace 303

Paige at Simple Thoughts

Marla at Kinda Sorta

Just Ask Beth

Gwyn at The Pink Tractor

The Mrs. at One Fabulous Mom

Michele

Laura

Tiffany

JT and Angie at Our Treasure Our Heart

It's Raining Pearls

Many thanks to each and everyone of you again! I hope you will find some encouragement here today within this post full of scriptures and sweet comments!

Happy Monday!

A Little Giggle

2011-09-21T10:43:00.000-05:00

Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement and the many beautiful scriptures you've written about this week! I am working on a thank you post in the best possible way you can thank a reader in the blog world....with links!

I thought I would share a few pictures of just another ordinary day here at our house! Hope it brings you a giggle. For those of you with three year old little boys......well, you already know what I am talking about.

They climb on anything and everything. They do the craziest things I have ever seen in my life. And they will not wear clothes! If you even so much as try to dress them it may look like you are actually wrestling a small animal!

I'm thinking about just tying a white flag around the antenna on my car.

I surrender.

I love my boys....all three of them.

Someone decided to dump out an entire container of "Magnolia Petals" Baby Powder. When I asked him what in the name of our Lord and Savior he thought he was doing he said "I'm wassshin my car Mama!!!" I do not have any pictures of what I discovered after this because I was too busy crying. This precious, adorable, little love of three years old climbed back inside the crib and poured out the rest of the container of powder on top of his baby brother! Preston looked like a giant marshmallow with fat rolls. I'm still vacuuming up the cloud of smoke in the nursery....

Have mercy.

I'm pretty sure I prayed to be raptured up after this.....

Happy Wednesday!!!

Light Affliction

2011-09-19T13:52:00.000-05:00

Even before the alarm sounded this morning, I was awake.

I was up pacing the floor and thinking about the "what if's" and whispering the "please Lord's".

Praying for all of Heaven's attention on a Monday morning at two a.m.

One would think I've learned how to trust by now......

And I have on many levels.

But bigger storms require a deeper trusting.

There were babies asleep in my bed and I should have been sleeping too.

But I was busy watching over them.

Asking for more mercy and more grace than I am probably allowed and begging Him to equip me. I don't want to just "get through" another week. But I want to Mother them and Mother them well.

Not out of exhaustion. Not out of a heavy burden. And not out of frustration.

I long to Mother them out of a place and space filled with love and grace- no matter what.

This is when I start the clinging on of Jesus.

But Monday mornings tend to bring this out in me.

When the man who is the rock of this family walks out the door at 5:00 a.m. every Monday morning and doesn't return until late Friday night every, single week.

Two years and two months now, but I am not counting.

I want what I had scripted for my life. I want what looks and sounds and feels like the very definition of a happy, normal life even though we all know that "normal is just a setting on the dishwasher."

I think that most of the time I am a really strong person. I can handle a lot.

But today, in the wee hours of the morning, I started feeling like I couldn't do this anymore...

I'm tired of having to be so strong.

I am worn out bone weary and heartbroken from doing life completely solo.

I want my Husband to wake up with us as a family, have breakfast together, take the kids to school together. And be home with us again at five o'clock so that we can have dinner together as a family every night.

I long for this.

I want him home for baths, homework, prayers, bedtime stories and a sweet baby learning to crawl.

When he's gone, it doesn't feel right. We are all kinds of out of sorts.

Including but not limited to, arriving at our destination by the seat of our pants with at least one person missing a pair of shoes.

Although on a good day, it's just one person, one shoe. Thank you Jesus.

I've got to be the best "Mama-Daddy" in the world for these children and there are days that I don't know how I'm going to do it.

I long for community.

But some women love to tear each other down and I just can't bear that right now.

I don't want mean spirited questions.

I don't want rude comments.

I don't want the jabs and the putdowns spoken with a smile.

I don't want someone bringing me dinner when I have a baby just so they can see the inside of my house.

Please Lord.

It's nothing close to perfect.

And it certainly is not filled with the types of furnishings and such that some people strive for in life.

My home is decorated with prayers and sacrifice and the footprints of six precious children.

I don't want someone offering to host my child for a play date just so they can compare their child against mine .

Their child will win every time.

Because I am doing the job of two people right now and confident that every, single one of my children could act better, do better and be better. Amen.

We don't always sit down at the table and have a civilized dinner.

Sometimes we drive through "Happy Donalds" and by the time we get home there isn't a chicken nugget in sight. In fact, if you opened the door to my SUV right now I can promise you that a french fry will spill out of the car door.

We don't always place our napkin in our lap. We don't always use our manners. We don't always do and say the right thing but we try. Lord do we try.

But the last time I checked, the raising of children isn't a "dog and pony show."

I'm not interested in performance based parenting......

This isn't what I would have scripted for my life but I am doing everything I can right now to pour into and love six precious children.

Things can change for better or worse overnight.

Change has no address. Sometimes, it just happens.

This isn't what I prayed for. Hoped for. Dreamed for. This separation within our own family.

It's just life.

Life can stop you on a dime and give you five cents change....
It can catch us completely off guard and knock the breath out of us and pull the rug out from underneath us all at the same time.

As I was pacing the floor this morning, and the tears came.... He dropped two words in my spirit.

"Light affliction."

Which took me to that oh -so- wonderful scripture.

You know the one...

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal." ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Do you have a favorite scripture that helps you through your "light afflictions?"

Please share it here so we can all get a big impartation of His glorious word today.

I'm mindful today not to lose heart.......praying that for you too.

Remember To Love

2011-09-11T12:05:00.000-05:00

Image: Huffington Post ~ Sept. 11th Anniversary Coverage

I'm remembering today. Honoring today. Praying for those who lost so much ten years ago today.

Those who have an empty space that can never be filled.

For all of those who lost sons and daughters.

Mothers and Fathers.

Brothers and Sisters.

Praying that the only One who can truly comfort would cover and hover and pour out His love upon them today...

I'm remembering today ....

We were there.

There are no words that can describe. No human prayer big enough to cover the loss. To ease the pain.

If you have family who loves you ......who wants you......call them. Go and see them. Hug them. Make up and apologize to one another. Find the best in one another. Overlook their shortcomings. Pray for them. Forgive them. Bless them. Write to them. Prefer them over yourself.......remember to love.

I'm holding my babies and my husband tight today.

A Better Plan

2011-09-07T12:11:00.001-05:00

This morning the home phone rang at the crack of dawn and it was her.

It was my first born gift.

My Macey Girl.

That sweet thing that still sits in my lap and has a
thick as Aunt Jemima syrup southern drawl that melts my heart every single time I hear it.

She has a "sing songy" professional happy person personality and can have me in stitches within minutes.

I love my baby girl. Twenty one years and eight months old worth of love.

With a heart the size of Texas and a personality that could land her a talk show of her very own.

She has a razor sharp quick wit and I mean razor sharp beyond her years.

She can hold her own....Lord can she ever.

She is an old soul. A lover of children, home, family and every hair care product ever made.

She walks with a quiet faith. I love that about her....

I've watched her grow and blossom and hit some bumps during these 21 years and 8 months.

I've watched the very definition of grace be made manifest in her life and watched her begin to walk in her own understanding of that very word.

As I was listening to her share her world with me this morning, while stepping over toddlers hanging on my legs. While packing the Star Wars lunch box, while trying to rescue a naked three year old who had accidentally locked himself inside the SUV. While trying to find just one pair of matching knee socks.

I stopped everything and remembered.

When it was just us.

In January of 1990 on the tenth day.

When God Himself called me to my life long dream of becoming a Mother.

There wasn't a bring home outfit, or birth announcement or a wedding band on my left hand.

But He was there. Hovering over me and my brand new baby girl. I realize that now....

And I had never loved anything as much as I loved that child.

I was eighteen years old and not a dime to my name but I loved her.....

I didn't know the proper and exact "by the book" way to do things and did not have the money that would afford giving her the most beautiful nursery and all the things that go along with that.

But I loved her.

I wasn't anything close to the perfect Mother and made many wrong decisions.

But I loved her.

And no hell or high water was going to take her away from me.

We walked through our fair share of those very things. Book worthy things.

We have known sorrow and heartache and the very definition of what it means to overcome hardship.

But if we hadn't walked through those things I don't know that Macey would be who she is today.

And I love who she is. And who God has called her to be.

My second dream after motherhood was to be a professional dancer. Years of training and lessons gave me the chance to do just that. I wanted to move to NYC and dance my way into destiny and never stop.

It was my passion.

But God had a different plan.

And I am so thankful for that now.

I wouldn't trade it for all the pointe shoes and theater performances in the entire world.

After ten years of single motherhood, I met and married my precious husband.

He asked Macey's permission to marry me. (She said "Yes!")

He proposed to me and then to Macey on bended knee.

He gave an engagement ring to me and then a diamond cross to Macey.

"I want to be a Father to you baby and we are going to be a family." He meant it. Every word of it.

Melt me.

He said vows to me and then to Macey on our wedding day.

Melt me.

He danced with me at our reception and then with Macey.

Melt me.

Talk about a recompense.........

My husband had a big dream too.

I remember many conversations about his dream to play in the NFL.

He was blessed with a full scholarship to play for a major university in college. (the one where the bank has to close early on game day and all the bank ladies wear dangly earrings in team colors. None other than the SEC!)

His dream was to eventually play in the NFL and he had all the talent and ability to do just that.

And then it happened.

A major knee injury during a practice changed everything.

His dream of playing in the NFL was over.

I remember the day we were sitting together talking about how the injury changed everything and I asked one simple question.

"Honey, what was the month and year that all of this happened?"

"April of 1989."

I just stood there in complete shock and awe and disbelief.

I remember him standing there staring at me.

"Do you know the month and the year that I became pregnant with Macey?"

"April of 1989."

God had a different plan. A better plan. A family plan.

We could not believe how God orchestrated things on our behalf years before we would even realize what had happened. That two very young people with two very big and very different dreams would be turned toward a new plan, His plan, during the exact month of the exact year in the exact same state.

I doubt we ever would have met one another if he had been drafted into the NFL because this girl has never set foot inside an NFL game. I'm also fairly convinced that my husband would never have set foot inside a major theater in the middle of Manhattan~ especially not the ballet.

So maybe, just maybe and this is just a thought......

Right now whatever you are going through, walking through, pushing through is part of a greater plan. A plan with a purpose so grand you couldn't have orchestrated it if you tried. A purpose so full of destiny that no eye has seen and no ear has heard of such wonder and goodness.

There is a man who will love you and love your children as if they were his own. You can raise children as a single mother with very little money, without the love and support of family and friends, without status, things, position, titles and degrees and they will turn out to be wonderful human beings.

I want to encourage you today to scoop those babies up in your arms, eat peanut butter and jelly to keep the lights on if you have to and sing His praises for what He is about to do in your life.

It's just a better plan.

His plan.

The best is yet to come sweet friends.....

"Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him." 1 Corinthians 2:9

The Waiting Room

2011-09-05T11:52:00.000-05:00

I can remember being on the outside looking in. Leaning against the glass separating me between faith, the substance of things hoped for, and the manifestation of that faith.

The miracle.

I've had my face pressed against the waiting room side of faith for most of my life.

Pressed hard against those places called hope and patience and good things come to those who wait.

The waiting room.

God's personal holding pattern.

His promises are "Yes and Amen." But His answers are sometimes "I have a different plan" or in the case of my own personal testimony in many different areas.

"Wait."

I have memories of waiting and believing. Waiting and praising Him in the midst. Waiting only to end up with closed doors. Waiting for my turn to finally come only to be blindsighted with another trauma. Another heartache.

Waiting and crying myself to sleep because the two most beautiful pink lines in the entire world didn't appear on my stick. Years of that type of waiting. That sacrificial waiting . Holy waiting. Waiting with a praise in my heart for everybody else's baby that was born. For every birth announcement in the mail. For every beautiful, glowing expectant mother I saw over and over again.

There isn't anything more beautiful than a woman who is expecting.

Except for the day when what she was expecting has been made manifest and is finally in her arms.

The miracle.

And by His grace I have six of my own.

Grateful me....

I remember waiting for my husband to propose. And thinking that if he didn't I was absolutely going to die and somebody would have to bury me and my entire collection of little girl dreams and Martha Stewart magazines along with me.

I'm southern for heavens' sake.

And southern girls dream about their wedding day and talk about their wedding day and plan on their wedding day from the time they are old enough to twirl.

And I might as well have been born carrying a bouquet.

Last year on May 20 I celebrated ten years of marriage with my husband. For our anniversary all I wanted was to see the babies.

Not your average ten year anniversary gift but that is what my heart wanted...

I needed to stand next to someone else's miracle.

Because last May 20 I was believing God for a few things in my own life. A whole list of them actually.

And when you are believing God for a miracle in your own life there isn't anything that will jumpstart your faith quicker than standing next to somebody else's.

And I happen to personally believe that the greatest miracle on earth is the gift that is a newborn baby.

He drove me downtown to the hospital and walked me straight up to the waiting room of the maternity floor and stood back and waited for me.

There were some deep breaths and tears fell and I whispered to Him the desires of my heart.

Right there in that waiting room.

Right there on the "I'm believing God for...." side of the glass.

He spoke to my heart.

I heard the Father whisper to me that morning...

"Right now you are in the waiting room. But soon, you are going to be in the delivery room both in the spiritual and in the natural."

Big sigh.

If you've visited here before you may remember that I was already expecting and had absolutely no idea.

He had gone before me.

Any woman who has ever been "expectant" knows a thing or two about waiting.

But the delivery.... The bringing forth of that which was promised to you. The birthing of that which was once a prayer request, a heart cry, a dream within the deep places. It makes all the waiting worth while.

Maybe your " delivery" is graduation day or adoption day. Maybe it is the contract on the sale of your home or the acceptance of your offer on one. Maybe it is the first day on the job of your dreams. Or the
wedding day you've waited a lifetime for..

You will deliver sweet friend.

It's going to happen.

You may be safe and sound in His holding pattern right now.

Pacing back and forth in the waiting room. But it is going to happen. You are going to deliver. One day at the appointed time, you will walk across the stage and receive your diploma. You will walk down the aisle and have a partner in this life. You will have the job you have dreamed about. You will have your song published and your book published and your screen play published. You will fulfill the call that is on your life. You will go on that missionary trip and love those children who have no hope. You will learn to trust again. Love again. Hope again. Dream again. Begin again. Start over again.......

Don't depise the waiting room.

My prayer for you today, on this Labor day is that the hope which is within you. That which you've discounted, pushed aside or allowed to die. That today, maybe you would allow God to do a beautiful work in you this morning. That those special things, dreams and ideas would be stirred up again and would begin to grow and that at the appointed time.....you would deliver.

" Each young woman's turn came to go in to King Ahasuerus AFTER she had completed twelve months' preparation, according to the regulations for the women, for thus were the days of their preparation apportioned: six months with oil of myrrh, and six months with perfumes and preparations for beautifying women." Esther ~ 2:12

I absolutely love what God calls the waiting room in His word.....

Beauty Preparations.

Waiting makes us beautiful if we will allow it....

Courage Creates Change

2011-08-15T08:44:00.000-05:00

Photo Credit: The Help.Com

Well. I finally got to see it yesterday afternoon. Finally.
I went with my gift of a girlfriend next door neighbor and her best friend.

I told her we had to wear our pearls.

I felt it was a pearl worthy event.

Lord knows I haven't been to the movies with a girlfriend in years.

Thank you to my sweet husband who loved on five babies so I could have a little break.

I have been waiting with bated breath to experience on the big screen the
522 page book I devoured in two days.

I may not have cooked, cleaned or folded a single piece of clothing during the reading of this novel.

It is a page turner times ten.

If you haven't seen the movie yet and you haven't read the book either, my humble suggestion is to do yourself a favor and read the book first.

There are little details that go by very quickly on the big screen that you may miss if you haven't read the book. (Like what was written on the check when Hilly opened her letter for one)

The folks seated to my right kept asking their one friend who had read the book a bunch of questions during the movie!

We did not get to sit together. The movie was packed out on a Sunday afternoon even four days after opening day.

Go early. Especially if you want two or more seats together and bring tissues.

Or if you are like me and forgot your tissues, just use the sleeves of the sweater you wore tied around your neck. As long as you don't mind your sweater being covered with black mascara and tears.

Here are a few of my thoughts on the movie. There are too many to count!! It was life changing for me and I am still wrecked on so many levels this morning after a 4:15 showing yesterday afternoon.

I fell in love with Skeeter and Minny and Aibileen during the reading of the book.

I loved their courage above all else.

Courage creates change.

Courage changes lives.

Courage causes the very reason God created us to come forth and causes fear to take the back seat.

Sometimes we have to be willing to lose everything to discover the reason He created us.

Sometimes (a lot of times) friends will not agree with the thing that you are called to do. Do it anyway.

One of my favorite parts of the movie (there are SO many) is the first time Aibileen says to Mae Mobley...

"You is kind. You is smart. You is important. "

I lost it.

When Mae Mobley repeated it back to her later on in the movie.

Forget it.

The sweater sleeves were dripping with mascara.

Our children have deep wells within that hold and remember the words we speak over them.

I have to speak more life. I have to take motherhood up a few more notches.

More goodness. More love. More wisdom. More encouragement.

Because the world is sitting on ready to tell them otherwise.

Maybe Skeeter had the courage to write and fulfill her calling because of the years of life Constantine had spoken over her as a child.

When they flashed that very moment on the screen and Constantine spoke those words about choosing not to believe the negative things people say about you and how ugly is something that "live up on the inside."

Lost it again. For about the tenth time.

Another one of my favorite parts was at the end when Aibileen said this.....

"No one had ever asked me how it felt to be me. When I finally got to share it............ I felt free. "

It wrecked me.

There is something about sharing our story.

Sharing our testimony.

The bad things turned into good things. The ashes turned into beauty. The mourning turned into joy.

It takes courage.

It changes lives.

Have you read the book or seen the movie yet? What did you love the most?

Summer Update

2011-08-08T09:20:00.000-05:00

Rose Petal Ice Cream ~ Martha Stewart

Good Morning!

Happy Monday! We are rising and shining over here the best we can! We started the day out by dropping off Daddy at the airport at the crack of dawn this morning! The babies did not cry today and I was so thankful and hoped that either their hearts were full from the weekend or they've just grown accustomed to this life.......

We just passed the two year mark.

Raising five babies by myself.

Did you know that it is entirely possible that you can do the thing you think you cannot do?

It is true.

Thank Eleanor Roosevelt for that one.

I don't know how "well" I'm doing it all and judging by the looks of this house and the looks on the faces of all the perfect moms when they see us coming, it's not very well at all.

But I love my children and they know it. And that has to count for something.

When the perfect moms make their comments, lawdamercy, I try to remind myself that they do not have a clue what this is like. Trying to do life and raise up children with a husband who lives and works in another state and there is no end to it all in sight.

They have family for one thing and more help than the White House for another and in~laws and out~laws to call on and the mothership of all housekeepers coming in and out every day.

So I usually just smile and keep walking when the President of the rude comment club stops typing on her blackberry long enough to look up at me and tell me how crazy she thinks I am for having all of these children....

I don't see anything crazy.

I see a new generation.

I see a family.

I see a house full of the sounds of childhood and memory making mess making and sometimes very wild children!

I see how big God is after three miscarriages and a nurse who told me that I needed to check with my insurance to see what they would cover for infertility treatment.

And I never did.

I don't see anything crazy at all....

But I've had to let some things go. Like an immaculate car. Like clothes that are always pressed. And keeping this house clean every second of the live~long day, just to name a few.

In other news we have exactly two weeks left until school starts and I will have a third grader and a very excited little kindergartner on my hands!

He is practically sleeping in his backpack and has already worn his uniform!

I am in no hurry whatsoever for school to start.....

We love the summer and love the freedom it allows to do something different every day!

In more news I have finally given up dairy!

It actually happened.

Along with sugar, all sweets, bread, red meat and a host of other things.

I didn't think I could do it BUT as Eleanor Roosevelt said...

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do!"

I just finished/survived the first week and aside from having horrible headaches it went okay!

I recently saw a friend who looked incredible in every way and asked her what she was doing and she graciously shared the name of her nutritionist. Who by the way is absolutely the happiest person I have ever met in my life and a survivor of four different types of cancer!! She is amazing! Meeting her was truly an answer to prayer and a special gift from Him.

Grateful me.

So with my newly found knowledge from The Beauty Detox book and the help of this incredible woman I am hopefully on my way to losing ten years of baby weight.

Have I ever mentioned I weighed 120 pounds on my wedding day? Big Sigh.

I haven't seen the scales read 120 pounds since.

Three miscarriages and five babies later.......I have my work cut out for me.

I also started Zumba three times a week!

It has not been easy but I am desperate to lose this weight and live healthier and set a better example for my children....

I will share a little each week with how things are going. It is an eight week plan and then I'm on my own!

Hope you have a wonderful week filled with doing the very things you thought you could not do!

The Nectar Of Life

2011-08-05T08:18:00.000-05:00

The "nectar" as I see it....

Standing on your tippy toes to kiss your baby brother's tippy toes.

Sitting pretty in layers of white, cotton ruffles and delicious, naked baby feet

Big Brother teaching you all about his favorite orange airplane...

And another big brother who constantly kisses your cheeks...

Girly girl power....times three.

The gift that is mothering for 21 years and 6 months.........

A house full of boys AND girls.

Sunkissed faces and skin that smells like the beach air.

Baby bonnets and cotton day gowns.

Cars and trains. Legos and Star Wars.

Polly Pockets, Barbies and baby dolls.

High heels , hot pink nail polish and sassy sundresses.

More curling irons and hair care products than a celebrity.....

All under the same roof.

The "nectar" as I see it.....

Sometimes

2011-07-16T20:55:00.001-05:00

Sometimes.

Sometimes you love someone so much it requires an arabesque.

Completely unsolicited.

Without any prompting.

Of any kind.

It's just the way you love your newborn baby brother......

Deep sigh.

Home from the beach tonight.

This is one of my all time favorite moments.

Ever.

So thankful I caught it from behind the lens.

More pictures soon....

Sweetness

2011-07-13T10:13:00.000-05:00

Baby Preston and Papa

July 2011

Good Morning! We are enjoying some much needed time away as a family this week. It's the first time we have traveled anywhere as a family of eight!

Oh the joy!

And the laughter!

And a few "what on earth?" moments!

My husband had scheduled a two week vacation for July at the start of his new job and I have been soaking up every moment and pretending this is what my life is really like.

Two coffee cups every morning.

And a Husband who is home every night.

It makes my heart sing to have all eight of us under the same roof and I am beyond grateful...

This precious, bouncing, baby boy has been a complete angel!

He has rolls for days and lets his Mama tie a bonnet on his sweet, little head every night for dinner.

I can't set my camera down for a second.

Too many moments to capture like this one.....

Safe in the palm of his earthly father.

I found it ministering to my heart in the deep places and a beautiful reminder...

We are soaking up the beach and holding delicious babies in both arms at our favorite place on earth.

Will write again soon sweet friends.

Happy Summer!

The Oil

2011-06-30T12:48:00.000-05:00

As I was busy with my morning routine and taking care of the needs of many little ones today, the Lord reminded me of something......

My oil.

And the price that has been paid for it.

As I mentioned in my last post about the waiting. (Oh the waiting!!) It's a good thing. It works patience in us. It grows our faith. It stretches us in ways we never thought we could be stretched.

Our waiting and our deeper trusting. It produces oil.....

Just as suffering does.

As we seek Him through our suffering. He turns our situations around and he turns our suffering into oil.

And oil sweet friends is what we need flowing in and through our life to best represent Him.

You can't demonstrate His heart without it.

Relationship with Him breathes. It flows. It loves. And is full of oil.

Oil flows from a life that has suffered. Survived. Overcome. Withstood.

And has something left to give.

In fact, has something left to pour into the hearts of others.

What we experience and overcome in life can work tremendous compassion in our hearts or it
can go the complete opposite route and cause bitterness and resentment to set up camp inside our hearts.

When we allow time with Him to work compassion in our hearts the oil flows.

It is what will cause you to notice the employee working behind the concession stand at Target while you are waiting to pay. It's what will cause you to walk over and make sure she is okay. To encourage her and to bless her.

You don't see uniforms or red shirts anymore at Target. You see hearts. You see people.

His people.

People who got up and came to work that day with a heart full of things that only God can repair.

It's what causes you to go from "people watching" to "people blessing."

It's what causes you to go from being a spectator to being an agent for change.

It's what creates an attitude inside your heart that leads you to finding creative ways to bless people.

Instead of indifference you walk with compassion.

Instead of thinking about it, you demonstrate it.

You don't see waiters and waitresses.

You no longer just see "the girl who answers the phones" behind the desk.

You no longer want to hear negative talk about "so and so and such and such."

You see hearts. You see opportunities to be His hands and feet. To be His mouthpiece.

Even in the midst of your own pain.

In the midst of your own suffering.

In the midst of your own trials and heartaches.

The immense joy of "people blessing" is the best cure for our own suffering.

I have found that the ones in life who are the greatest and most tremendous blessing to others are the ones who have suffered beyond comparison. They are the recipients of the largest quantities of precious oil and have made the choice to spend their life as a vessel for Him.

They are not limited in blessing others because of financial circumstances.
They bless anyway.

They are not waiting for things to "get better" in their own life before they will help others.
They bless in the midst of their waiting.

They are not too busy or to focused on their own life to pour into the lives of others.

They are creative. Inspirational. Intentional. Full of purpose.

They are life givers. Seed sowers and World changers.....

Surround yourself with people who pour......

I will leave you with my all time favorite quote by John Wesley.

"Do all the good you can,

By all the means you can,

In all the ways you can,

In all the places you can,

At all the times you can,

To all the people you can,

As long as ever you can."

Isn't that a beautiful way to live?

Talk about a lifestyle of worship......

I pray that this post fills your heart with encouragement today and plants way for opportunity and that most of all your life is dripping with His sweet smelling oil.......

Trust

2011-06-14T12:38:00.000-05:00

Right now. Right this very minute. I am waiting. Waiting for breakthrough in many areas.

Waiting for a phone call from my oldest daughter about something very important that's happening this morning. Waiting for a phone call from my childs Dr. with the lab results. Waiting to make sure my son is okay after an overnight stay in the hospital, tons of lab work and still they don't know what is wrong. Waiting to hear some response about a decision that we made. Waiting for something we've been waiting on a very long time scheduled to happen tomorrow.

And this morning as I was talking with Him. I shared my heart about all that we have going on personally. All that we are waiting on. All the things that need to work out. All that has my heart tied up in knots. All that has been consuming me so much lately that I can think about little else.

And He whispered....

"Are you waiting? Or are you trusting?"

Crickets.

I'm trusting of course.

And then I said something like this....
"I trust you Lord , you know that I do but I have to wait.... And I am tired of waiting. I need things to come together. I need things to work out. I need to feel settled for once. And for things to finally be okay for once."

He gently reminded me of three little letters that make the difference between simply waiting and actually
trusting.

Here they are.

B-u-t.

I trust you BUT......

That's where I found myself this morning.

Those three little letters keep me up at night and make my stomach turn and cause my heart to race.

It's easy to trust the Lord when everything is going well. When every prayer request is answered with a yes and everything in life seems to fall right into place.

In all of the major life changes that we have been walking through, I realized that I have hung my faith on uncertainty and despair.

I've camped out there many nights because life has sent me through the ringer and because the Lord has allowed so much over the last few years, I have slowly allowed my heart to be filled with despair.

Not intentionally.

Maybe out of weariness or out of exhaustion from parenting solo for so long.

I didn't even realize it.

Until this morning.

I have allowed my trust in Him to wander and waiver.

I've been on a spiritual see ~saw with the Lord.

I trust you Lord. Are you going to disappoint me again?

I trust you Lord. Are you going to allow this again?

I trust you Lord. How much are you going to allow Father?

Up and down . Day after day. Month after month.

It has taken it's toll.

I'm just being real. I'm sure most of you would never question the Lord.

But I do at times.

It's easy to trust the Lord when things are good. Really good.

I've experienced that side of Faith. That side of trusting Him.

It doesn't take much.

It's an entirely different level of faith to continue to trust Him without the breakthrough.

To trust Him as Jehovah Jirah. My provider.

I have believed God for incredible things over the years. Believed for babies for Mamas who couldn't seem to get pregnant. Believed for marriages to get healed who were headed for divorce. Believed for healing, supernatural finances and families to be restored.

And I have been blessed to be a witness to many of these testimonies as God proved to be faithful.

I love to believe God for other peoples breakthroughs.

I have discovered though that I do not always believe Him on the same level for myself.

And so this morning I am getting off the see~saw of despair and disappointment.

I am choosing to stand in the midst of the storm with both feet planted firmly in what I know to be true.

That He is.

And that no matter what ......He still is.

No matter what.

There is a recompense coming.

There is a breakthrough coming.

There is an answer and a blessing and a new thing coming.

He is working it out and He is orchestrating every single thing to work for our good and His glory.

Behold, the days are coming.

"Behold, the days are coming, says the Lord, when the plowman shall overtake the reaper, and the treader of grapes him who sows seed; The mountains shall drip with sweet wine, and all the hills shall flow with it. I will bring back the captives of My people Israel; They shall build the waste cities and inhabit them. They shall plant vineyards and drink wine from them; They shall also make gardens and eat fruit from them. I will plant them in their land, and no longer shall they be pulled up from the land I have given them, says the Lord your God. " ~ Amos 9: 13-15.

Summer

2011-06-08T11:48:00.000-05:00

The start of summer - Pearl and Ashton~ May 2011

Good Morning Friends! I hope that you all are soaking up the beautiful month of June. We are excited that school is out and summer has finally arrived and we are enjoying our easier mornings! I have done my best to take all five little ones to do something fun each day. I am not sure how I am doing it except that I feel His grace equipping me!

We have been praying for quite some time for a new job for my Husband here in town or that there would be a breakthrough with his current job and he could reside here with us full time.

Neither one happened.

Each time an opportunity would open up close to home and he would pursue it, God seemed to shut the door.

The only door that opened for him was still out of state. But it was a wonderful opportunity and so for that reason and several others he has accepted a new position.

We prefer life here for our children for many reasons and really felt God called us here two years ago but the distance is incredibly hard on a family and I am a little worn out to say the least.

So as I am approaching the two year mark of parenting solo, we are trying to follow the Lord's leading for our family and for what is best for our little ones. It has been a long season for us and we are praying for His guidance and continued grace.

In the meantime I am trying my best to give the children a special summer as well as try to hold everything together here at home!

On another note I would love to hear what you all are doing for the summer!

Where are you going on vacation? Do you have special things you are doing with your children each day or each week? I would love for you to share your ideas and plans in the comment section!

Thank you for sharing and Happy Summer!

The Beauty Detox

2011-05-21T15:17:00.000-05:00

Hope you all are enjoying your weekend! I wanted to share a wonderful book I've been reading. I am not finished with it but I have just been blown away by the wealth of knowledge written here so far!

I absolutely love to read and try to squeeze in as much as possible even in the midst of taking care of so many young children. I read at red lights:)

I found my copy at Target and have underlined and highlighted it to pieces. I feel that it is an answer to prayer for me personally as I have really struggled with my weight , skin and so on a lot in life.
Especially over the last ten years. Thanks to having lots of babies in a short amount of time!

Needless to say, I do not look or feel the way I wanted to look and feel at forty!

I hate to say this but I am not a gym person. I am most uncomfortable in a gym or fitness facility. I absolutely cannot stand it. The smell alone is enough to send me right out the door. One look at all of those folks dripping sweat all over those machines....no thank you.

I am ultra feminine. Ultra girly girl. I don't do gyms.

I admire all of you who are so disciplined and get up every single day and work out!

Here's hoping I can overcome my issues!

I do love a good dance class though. I LOVE to dance. And I can wear pink lip gloss and pearls to my dance class. So I am thinking about attempting a class as well as trying some of the suggestions in this wonderful new book.

I'll let you know how it's going.

I'll let you know if I survive cutting out all dairy. Have mercy.

Hope you all have a beautiful and blessed weekend!

Where Honor Is Due

2011-05-20T09:44:00.000-05:00

It is hard to put into words how grateful I am for this precious man.

How honored I am to partner with him in life and in the raising of our six children.

How blessed I am to walk beside him as his wife.

I absolutely adore him.

My life has been made richer because of him.

My joy magnified and multiplied over and over again because of him.

Eleven years ago today, after ten years of parenting solo as a single Mother, God saw fit to bless me with an incredible gift of a Husband and a beautiful Father for my baby girl. I finally had a family of my very own...

My Beautiful Husband,

You are the most incredible demonstration of the love of the Father that I have ever experienced.
Thank you for loving me and partnering with me in life. Thank you for never, ever giving up on me through the years of inner healing and through my process with the Lord. Thank you for being the only person in my entire life who has ever consistently stood beside me. The only person who could not be moved. The only person whom I could not push away. The only person who has ever loved me unconditionally. I honor you today......

Beautiful, genuine, incredible you.

I am rejoicing with you today and with our sweet babies.

How big is our God? How wonderful and magnificent is He who has blessed us six times over with the gift of a child. Unmerited grace.

How we longed and prayed for these children. Today my heart remembers our wedding day and our Pastor praying over us to be blessed with children during the ceremony. I remember when we lost three precious ones how our hearts where so broken and full of despair. And then because He is so faithful, how we experienced a supernatural joy through the years as He blessed us again and again with children.

He truly knows the desire of our hearts.

Three precious baby girls.....

And three delightful baby boys.

After all we have been through, walked through, persevered through the last decade, I am so incredibly grateful that God saw fit 13 years ago to allow our paths to cross.

(Thank you to the beautiful Suzy Thompson for the photography last April.)

I am still awestruck to this very day at how through your love for me and from the sweetest nickname in the world, a beautiful and very special ministry came forth. Thank you for calling me your Pearl so many years ago. Thank you for seeing in me what I could not see in myself. Thank you for supporting me and encouraging me and loving me through the oyster shell of my circumstances until I could fully walk in my calling and truly see myself as His pearl.....

The best is yet to come......

He says so in His word.

Spring Things

2011-05-17T09:40:00.000-05:00

Image: Martha Stewart

Good Morning! Hope this finds you all doing well! I wanted to pop in for just a minute and let you know that I am still here! We have had some celebrations here lately...My husbands birthday, Bennett's birthday, Easter, my birthday, Mother's Day and this weekend we will be celebrating our 11 year anniversary! I cannot believe it! We also have all of the end of the year school stuff going on like many of you and of course this delicious little newborn who has just absolutely stolen our hearts!!

Oh the sounds and the smell alone of a newborn is enough to send me right over the edge!

In addition I was so blessed to travel to New York City for a speaking engagement at a women's conference recently! I can't tell you how much it blessed me. I will say that for me personally it was just a really incredible experience. Each time I share pieces of my story publicly I am amazed at what the Father does. Really amazed at the way God will use those broken pieces and places of my life to bring Glory to Himself and also to bring healing and restoration to the broken places in others.

I love women's ministry and spend a lot of my time away from the computer in real life on a daily basis ministering to the hearts of women.

Without a title. Without a position. Without a paycheck.

After motherhood it is my greatest passion.

To become an instrument in the hands of the Father. To share what He has done in my life. To offer encouragement and hope and healing in some small way. It is a tremendous honor.....

I don't know if twenty years ago, with a baby in my arms and the lights cut off again in my little trailer, if I could have dreamed that one day I would be standing on a stage somewhere, sharing with the hearts of other women, some of whom have a baby in their arms and the lights cut off in their homes ....that God is God all by Himself. That if He did it for me then He will do it for them. That no matter how painful their circumstances are. He can turn it around and make things better. And better than they ever imagined. That He sees the end from the beginning and that He has incredible plans for their life.

I just don't know if I ever could have dreamed that something like that was even possible for me.

So as you can imagine, each time I stand on a stage or minister in a bible study or a women's group, it is equal parts overwhelming joy that the Father would see fit to offer the opportunity and also it is just incredibly humbling.

The girl who thought she wasn't supposed to be here.

God just has a beautiful way of bringing about a recompense that one can hardly put into words.

And I am still going through things. Some of which are really painful. My testimony is growing on a daily basis and there are some days that I say "ENOUGH already!" "I'm just one person!" "I can only take so much!"

But I try to remember that no matter how painful things are right now, God has a purpose and a plan and one day He may need to use these "light afflictions" to benefit another heart who is struggling. And hopefully I will be able to offer hope and encouragement out of real experience and heart knowledge and not just head knowledge.

I count it as one of life's greatest gifts.......

May you experience Him in the most beautiful ways this week sweet friends. I will be back soon to share tons of pictures.

Rose Petals

2011-05-02T10:47:00.000-05:00

If you know me in real life you know that I have a very big thing for flowers and especially rose petals.

Oh the rose petals!!!!

Years ago I used to have a small party planning/floral design business where I created small, intimate and detailed events for my clients. One of my favorite parts of my job was the chance to sprinkle and scatter rose petals everywhere.

I was like a child. Giddy with excitement!! I could hardly contain myself!

On my wedding day our sweet friends threw rose petals as we left the reception. No rice, birdseed or bubbles for me! Then once we arrived in Paris for part of our honeymoon I was beside myself to open the door and see rose petals all over the entire room, a special gift from my new groom!

A few years later once our baby girl was born I covered her with pink rose petals in her little hospital bassinet! All of the nurses shook their heads and rolled their eyes and could not believe someone would do such a thing! But I just scattered and covered her even more and loved every second of it.

She was the only baby in the nursery covered in rose petals, wearing a beautiful gown, wrapped in a pink blanket and wearing a monogrammed hat!!! I loved making such a fuss over her and had waited 13 years for another baby!!! It was a long awaited blessing for me and I relished in it.

Big Sigh.

Almost five years later we were blessed with another baby girl and this time rose petals came delivered to my hospital room in the most gorgeous packaging along with the most beautiful arrangement I have ever received!

This time when I scattered the petals on my newborn baby I had the help of her big sister! We covered her with petals , dressed her in a beautiful gown, wrapped her in a beautiful pink blanket and fitted her little monogrammed hat on her tiny head!

We did the same thing for all three of the boys minus the petals!!

I love to make a fuss over my children....

And every year on the birthdays of my baby girls they wake up to a bed of rose petals!!

And every year I celebrate my children in the most beautiful, glorious and creative ways I can imagine on the day of their birth. I cherish that day. I am beside myself on their birthdays. And I do everything I can to shower, scatter, cover, bless, sprinkle and love them in ways that minister to the deepest parts of their hearts.

One of the most amazing gifts in parenting is when the love you have given over the years comes full circle and suddenly it's you.....being showered, covered, loved and sprinkled.......

Today I woke up on the morning of my 40th birthday to this.........

Please excuse our messy hair and pajamas..... We are doing a little celebrating!

I'll be back tomorrow with more pictures. Today I am eating birthday cake and kissing babies!!

Decree A Thing {Part Two}

2011-04-22T21:43:00.000-05:00

Happy Good Friday to you! I'm back to share part two with a few little nuggets that have helped me over the years.

What did you decree today? What declarations have you made with spoken words?

Sometimes we don't even realize that we are actually making a declaration!

Words have power. Ever heard of a self fulfilling prophecy?

Also the use of the words "always" and "never" are usually the start of it!

Here are a few examples.....

I'll never get married.

I'm always broke.

Nothing ever works out for me.

I will never be successful.

I am always going to struggle.

My family is always going through hardships.

We never get a break.

I will never lose that much weight.

I am always going to be alone.

I am never going to get pregnant.

My husband will never love me like that.

I am always living paycheck to paycheck.

These are just a few examples.

Sometimes we can say lots and lots of things just like this over the course of one day. Especially when we really are going through a hard time.

So often these words will come to pass.

We have to use faith.

And speak those things that are not as though they were with declarations! (By faith)

Here are a few ideas!

I decree and declare that I am wealthy beyond measure both spiritually and naturally.

I decree and declare that I am blessed and highly favored.

I decree and declare that this situation and circumstance is turning in my favor.

I decree and declare that I walk in supernatural wisdom and discernment, gifts and talents.

I decree and declare that I walk in tremendous favor at the office and that promotions and increase are mine.

I decree and declare that I will walk in my calling and fulfill my purpose and His perfect will for my life.

I decree and declare that my gift will make room for me.

I decree and declare that my marriage is healthy and whole and full of His love and goodness.

I decree and declare that I am blessed with life ~ giving God ordained friendships.

I decree and declare that I lack no good thing and that every need is met beyond my expectations.

I decree and declare that I will meet and marry the person whom God has set aside for me.

I decree and declare that my womb is blessed and that I am able to conceive, carry and deliver healthy and whole full term babies.

I decree and declare that I walk in the anointing of love and the anointing of Motherhood.

I decree and declare that every bill is paid and that there is always more than enough.

I decree and declare that I will receive every good and perfect gift that He has set aside for me.

These are just a few ideas to get you started! I encourage you to research the many scripture references regarding the words we speak and the power within. I try to be mindful of these very things on a daily basis. Especially when I am walking through something incredibly difficult or painful.

It's so easy to slip back into speaking my circumstances. So easy. But He is so faithful to gently remind me of what to do with these powerful words. "What will you decree daughter?"

Happy Resurrection Weekend!

Speak Life!

Decree A Thing {Part One}

2011-04-21T10:05:00.000-05:00

As Easter makes her arrival this weekend I am mindful of a few things.

In between nursing a newborn. Diaper changes. Meals. Laundry and Egg hunts.

In the middle of some "things" that still haven't been sorted out.

In the midst of waiting and hoping for some prayers to be answered.

He continues to ask me a simple yet powerful question.

"What will you decree?"

If faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God.

If the word says that life and death are in the power of the tongue.

If the Father SPOKE the world into existence.

If He says we have not because we ask not.

If He says we pray but we pray amiss.

If He says we are tied to the words of our mouth.

Then there must be something about the words we speak!

One of my favorite scriptures is ;

You will decree a thing and it will be established for you;
So light will shine on your ways. ~ Job 22:28

Words have power.

I remember years ago the first time I was taught this simple yet life changing truth.

I could not believe that I had lived my life speaking death over circumstances and situations without any idea what I was doing.

No clue.

Additionally, there is power in the words that other people speak about you.

If I can hold my eyes open, I wake up with an offering of praise and thanksgiving and thank Him for giving me another day and more. Then, I pray against the power of any negative or mean spirited words spoken by others over me and my family.

They will not prosper. Amen.

Then I start decreeing and declaring over my husband and my babies!

There is power in the words we speak over our family!

In a world where people call their children "crazy"," insane" and "terrors." Keep speaking life over your babies. Even your grown babies! As their mother you have tremendous spiritual authority!

Speak life.

I am not the president of the spiritual warfare club. But I love to pray and I love to pray and speak life over my husband and children. Even though there are days......oh my. I know you know what I mean.

But I try to remember the power of my words.......

Here are a few declarations I pray over all of my children as much as possible!

You are blessed and highly favored.

You are above and not beneath.

You are the head and not the tail.

You increase in wisdom and stature with God and men every day.

You are full of purpose and destiny.

You are favored above all.

You have been chosen for such a time as this.

You are blessed from the top of your head to the soles of your feet.

You have been set apart.

You are His favorite.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Every place you set your foot you shall possess the land.

Everything you set your hand to shall prosper you.

You are highly gifted and walk in supernatural favor and blessings.

You are blessed coming in and going out.

You walk in the overflow.

People bend over backwards to bless you.

You are called. chosen. anointed and appointed for such a time as this.

You will fulfill your purpose.

You are loved and favored by your siblings.

You are loved, cherished and adored by God and others.

You are beautiful and have His heart for His people.

You have supernatural wisdom and intellect.

You have the compassion of Christ.

No weapon formed against you will ever prosper.

Every tongue that rises against you the Lord shall condemn.

You will have double honor all the days of your life.

Speak life on purpose for their purpose!

These are just a few "blessings" you can pray over your children. I will be back to share part two tomorrow. (A few things that have helped me to decree and declare over circumstances and situations!)

Start Dreaming Again

2011-04-08T10:45:00.000-05:00

Source: Img Spark

Who said you couldn't do it? Who told you not to bother? Who said you would never make it?

Who told you it's too late? You're too old! You're too young!

You're not smart enough.

Strong enough.

Important enough.

Rich enough.

Who told you to stuff that dream way down inside your heart and never, ever mention it again?

Who said that it will never happen?

That dream job.

That college degree.

That book being published.

That incredible gift of a husband.

That positive pregnancy test.

That precious baby in your arms....

Who told you it would never happen for you?

That your not worth it.

That it's too late.

I have a newsflash....................

It's not over.

You haven't even gotten started yet.

You're just getting warmed up.

Life can change in a minute.

You could meet "him" today.

That baby is yours.

You are worth it.

You deserve better.

Your dreams are God dreams. He placed them inside you.

You may have to let go of some unhealthy people in your life.

It's okay to do that. It's even better to bless them as you do so.

You have a purpose.

And it's powerful.

Ask God to show you why He created you. You'll be awake all night writing it down.

It's not too late.

You're not too old. Or too young.

God sees the end from the beginning.

He knows the purposes and the plans He has for you.

He wants to bless you. Prosper you. And give you the desires of your heart.

It's bigger than what you think it is.

His plan is always better than ours.

So start dreaming again and trust Him...

He is faithful to fulfill the good work which He has begun in you.

Happy dreaming this weekend.

Daddy's Little Girl

2011-04-06T06:15:00.032-05:00

I have been blessed with a special gift today! I am sharing a small piece of my story for "Word Women Wednesday" at Tiffini's incredible blog The House of Belonging.

It will take you all of about five minutes to see how much she loves the Lord and to see that she has a tremendous heart for His women and their stories.

Healing springs forth when we share our stories sweet friends.

Please stop by and visit my beautiful new friend and read a little bit about how I finally became

Daddy's little girl......

*********************************************************************************
( As a side note: This post was written in reference to my entire childhood and out of the reality that my birth father never came back for me and never tried to establish a relationship with me. I searched for him as a grown woman and found him. (as so many of us do) And that piece of my heart is for another post~)

Thank you Tiffini for allowing me to share today and for all that you are doing for Him.

You are a beautiful gift to the blog world......

This Is How We Roll

2011-03-29T13:07:00.000-05:00

Good Morning! Happy Spring!

I wanted to thank you all so much for your prayers.....

I survived week before last week solo~ but barely!

Mainly because that horrible stomach bug continued to cycle through our house for about 12 days or so!! I felt so badly for the kiddies. We spent their entire spring break in the house except for one afternoon at the park. I was doing okay until the child who had it first got it again for the THIRD time.

Luckily, I had a beautiful strength to survive it all thanks to your prayers! I am so grateful it's over with and we are moving on!

Big Daddy was home with us last week trying his best to work. Bless him.

I love it when he's home. I feel like I can breathe a little bit.

We had THE most beautiful weather here weekend before last and spent the entire weekend outside.

Baby Preston is doing well and is just about the most delicious thing on earth!!
We are so in love with him!

Here are a few pictures of a gorgeous morning we had together ! I think they needed the sunshine and fresh air so desperately after being cooped up with the stomach bug all week.

Pearl Baby and Big Daddy

Blowing Kisses

These two keep me busy......14 months apart!

Little Mama!

She begged and pleaded.

The. Entire. Walk. Around. The. Lake. This is what I heard....

"PLEASE MAMA! PLEASE. PLEASE let me wear the baby!"

So here they are!

I have never seen her so happy!! She kissed him with every step....

And my personal favorite photo of our morning!

This is how we roll. Amen.

For those of you who may be wondering what on earth that giant

white, marshmallow looking thing is taking up half of the stroller......

That thing happens to be my sons' bumper pads!

Usually we just wrap them around him like a giant feather boa...

They go with us everywhere. And I do mean everywhere.

If you want to find out all about it you can read the details here.

Thank you again for your prayers sweet friends! I will write again when I can catch my breath.
I'm flying solo again this week. Hope you all are knee deep in some potting soil and flower beds!

Happy Spring!

Hurry Home

2011-03-11T14:09:00.000-06:00

I wanted to pop in and wish you all a happy weekend!

We are anxiously awaiting Daddy's arrival home tonight. He has been away all week and is only home for two days and is leaving again for another week. I am especially excited to have him home since the minute he left our entire family came down with Stomach Bug 2011.

I'm not sure I can put into words what all has transpired here this week but I know that if were not
for His grace .....

I will spare you the details.

Amen.

The good news is that it's finally March! A huge turning point for me each year. The first day of spring is coming up in another week or so and daylight savings time is this weekend. The weather is finally warming up and the days are longer and I feel like I can start to get out of the house a little more.

I wanted to ask you if you would please say a few prayers for a supernatural week for us next week. The kiddies are all out of school for spring break and Daddy will be out of town the entire week.

This will be the first time since Preston's arrival that I will be solo with everyone for two weeks in a row.
Add in the exhaustion of five children with the stomach bug. No sleep. Cooking. Cleaning. Laundry and nursing a newborn and I am just a little nervous about next week.

They took everything I had this week!

I may have to pull a "Scarlet O'Hara" and "take to my bed" this weekend!!!

I have made a little list of special things to do for them and with them and I am going to try my best
to offer a somewhat enjoyable break from school.

I have the most energy (Ha!) in the mornings so I think we will head out for mini field trips in the a.m. and then come home for lunch and naps and then out to the park each afternoon with scooters and bicycles and "The Preston" in his stroller!

Here's hoping it all goes well. I'll let you know and will post pictures if I can hold my eyes open!

Happy Spring!

Survival Mode

2011-02-25T21:08:00.001-06:00

This week was a big week for us! I still can't believe I did it.

Well. Me and Jesus.

Daddy had to leave for the entire week. Again. For the second time since Preston's birth.

Which might explain why I haven't had one second to write a single post!

I've been in survival mode.

Flying completely solo with five babies.

And I have failed miserably. I just have to say.

Thank goodness I have an incredibly sweet neighbor who has driven and picked up
two of the kiddies a couple of times this week for me. She is a precious soul.

Loading five babies at the crack of dawn to drive one to school at 8:00 and then two to school at 9:00
has been a little hectic!

Someone always needs to go to the potty.

Someone is usually crying.

Someone may or may not like their lunch. Or their outfit. Or the radio station.

The list goes on.

In addition, I'm on the lookout for a set of stripes and a whistle if anyone knows where I can buy such things- without being an official referee and all.

Do you think they would sell those items to a sleep deprived Mother of six?

I need those stripes and that whistle to break up all the WWF smack downs that have occurred here
this week!

Seriously. They've had a few disagreements.

Everyone is out of sorts. So I am doing my best to be the Mama~Daddy this week.

I feel terrible living in survival mode- instead of "enjoying our life mode"- but that's just what we've
had to do to get through until Big Daddy gets in tonight.

Que the choir.

And he can't get here soon enough.

Thank you Jesus.

This week has been wonderful in so many ways....

All the kids piled up in my bed. Everyone taking turns holding baby Preston. Listening to the kids
sing in the car on the way to school......

And it has been absolutely wild in other ways.

So much so I had to ask that sweet neighbor of mine if she wanted to "view" a disaster in the laundry
room the other day. It involved Dreft laundry detergent ~( the powder) and a two year old who apparently thought it was a sand box. Oh my. She had no words.

I didn't either.

Hopefully she will still allow our children to play together.

In addition everyone officially hates their car seat. Yes. Of course.
And Ashton decided that this week, while Daddy was away he would learn to climb out of his crib.

It's been a character developing week for Mama.

I am anxiously awaiting the day that he can be home with us every, single night.
It's coming soon. I just know it.

And I will never, ever take for granted having my husband home every night ever again.

Trust.

In other news Baby Preston is doing beautifully and is just delicious! Oh we all want to "put him on a biscuit" as they say in the south! We are enjoying him so much and cannot believe that he is five weeks old today! He is really getting some serious baby rolls ..my favorite thing! Pictures soon.

One of the highlights of my week was finding Emma Pearl using my breast pump.

Oh my.

I'll spare you the photograph of that!

But for your viewing pleasure I will leave you with one of my monumental moments as a Mother..

As if I didn't have enough going on.........this happened.

That's right. Someone with great, big, blue eyes and a pink hair bow decided to call 911.

I told the officers that no, there was no emergency but that I was a blogger and I was gonna
need a picture of this!

They were good sports!

Have a great weekend! We are loading up the party van to head to the airport and then I am going to collapse:) I'll post again with more pictures soon!

Love Is

2011-02-14T23:24:00.001-06:00

Love is the gift of a brand new baby brother.......

Tiny kisses on his forehead.

It is the most precious set of feet that have stolen our hearts.....

Love is three sets of great, big baby blues.......

Love is not being in a hurry. Slowing down. Afternoon naps and a camera in hand....

Love is having three big sisters who absolutely adore you.......

Love is a warm bath and siblings begging to hold you and brush your tiny wisps of hair.....

Love is a moment of childhood captured from behind the lens.....

It is three precious boys to cherish and a halo of sunshine on the crown of their heads.....

Love is spending the afternoon delighting in your children.

Love is beautiful exhaustion .......and worth every second of it.

It is the delicious fragrance and the promised sound of your sixth gift......

Love is mercy and grace and hope and faith and joy......unspeakable.

Love is a heart filled with gratitude.......

And six precious children who have caused their parents to rejoice in thanksgiving in ways they never dreamed were possible.

"He is able to do exceedingly and abundantly above all you can think, hope or imagine"

Many blessings to you all on this special day.....

Two Sweet Weeks

2011-02-04T18:02:00.000-06:00

Here is a picture of The Prince taken just this afternoon! Somehow I managed to squeeze in a few pictures in between school pick ups and nursing and laundry and so on.

I couldn't resist.

I wanted to remember this moment at two precious weeks old forever.

Pure sweetness.

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend filled with delicious hot cocoa, pink heart shaped marshmallows and lots and lots of chocolate!!

I have to get back to holding my little bon bon!

Thank you again for your love and prayers and the absolute sweetest comments .....it means so much to us.

Increase

2011-01-26T22:08:00.000-06:00

Here are a few pictures of Preston's arrival! I'm so sorry for the delay in posting! We have had a beautiful and very busy few days once arriving home from the hospital and I am still trying to recover as well as make sure every single heart is doing okay here and isn't feeling left out in any way....that is so important to me.

Minutes old with Big Daddy. He is overwhelmed by the Father's love and bursting with gratitude!

These tiny feet have increased our household made a permanent impression on our hearts forever.......

I was worried about our youngest and how he would respond since he has been the baby in our house for 2 years and 5 months.....

We brought him in first and alone to meet his baby brother for the first time.....

This was his immediate response. All worries were put to rest and there were lots of tears of joy.....

The baby girl in our house took to Preston like a mother hen. She was SO sweet to him!!

Big brother had the same response. Grateful. Thankful me.......

And sweet Bella with baby brother.....oh the joy of these two together.....sweetness magnified.

Big brother and big sister gifts for all the kids hand delivered by my sister.......I have always wanted my sister to be present for the births of my children and the distance separated us and she was never able to be present. But God is so good.....she was able to be present this time and she blessed my family in such beautiful ways. It was like Christmas for my babies! She picked out multiple gifts for each child based on their likes and interests and blessed them so much!!! My heart was bursting with joy.......

Big Daddy and the girls with Preston....

Meeting brother for the first time.......

Little Mama Bears.....

My beautiful niece....she loved holding and cuddling baby Preston!

Toy city in my hospital room thanks to YaYa! We even had a tea party!

My first born and my youngest gifts.......His grace poured out......

Mae~ Mae and Preston.

My three sons!!!!!

My beautiful sister, me and the Prince!

The tiniest feet....

Our sweet boy......

Leaving the hospital!

I hope to post again soon with more pictures and things to share. Trying to rest and recover this week. Thank you again for all of your love, support and prayers! It has meant so much to our family....

A Beautiful Birthday

2011-01-21T21:48:00.001-06:00

Our oldest and our youngest!

Sweet baby Preston Grant made his arrival today at 4:24 p.m.! Weighing in at 8 pounds 12 ounces and is a beautiful 20 inches long! He is healthy and whole in every way and we are overjoyed and so very thankful in a thousand different ways tonight!

Most importantly we wanted to thank each and every one of you who prayed and interceded for us! We've had a long day and a long labor due to the position he was in but your prayers helped bring him to us beautifully!

So a million thank yous. My heart is singing and I am holding a great big, beautiful, bouncing baby boy.

Glory to His precious name....

I will try to post pictures in the morning. Mama is tired and so very thankful.....

Baby Day

2011-01-21T09:04:00.000-06:00

Our little prince is making his arrival today!!! Be still my heart....

We arrived at the hospital to be induced early this morning and my water broke on it's on for the very first time ever shortly after we arrived. Thank goodness we were already here! Just wanted to give you a little update and ask you for your continued prayers. We can feel them!

Mae~ Mae and her sweet friend Andrea are with all of my babies and the schools are closed for a snow day today! So all of my little pearls are well taken care of and I am beyond grateful for that. It couldn't have worked out any better!

We are praying for a supernatural day and hope to have pictures to post along with the good news before the end of the day today!

I can hardly wait to hold this precious promise in my arms.....

Thank you for your love and prayers.....

Still Waiting

2011-01-13T14:44:00.000-06:00

Photo Credit: Martha Stewart

Oh I wish he was here! Soon but not today. I can hardly wait for the day!

I was sent to labor and delivery yesterday. We thought for certain he was making his arrival!

After several hours at the hospital this mother of five children was sent home.

Contractions still 7 minutes apart and only 3 centimeters. Apparently that is not considered active labor.

Alrighty.

You'd think I would know that.

So we are nesting today and I have changed around the furniture and washed tiny baby loads of
laundry in lavender detergent and arranged the diapers and the changing table goodies at least 3 times.

I've been busy doing those very important kinds of things instead of tending to the mountains of regular laundry that awaits me. Which means I may have had to "break in" to my hospital bag to steal a pair of clean undies this morning.....giggles.

My bag is almost packed.

The call list is almost finished.

The kids outfits are ready.

The cameras are charged.

The blue polka dot delivery down is ready!

And I'm praying for the sweet Lord to go before us and prepare every detail in advance.

He's so good at that.

I have taken some pictures of Prince Preston's nursery and will share those with you in my next post.

Even though we are awaiting his arrival with great anticipation I am enjoying these last few moments of pregnancy. It is the most miraculous time. And I absolutely love every second of it.

Thank you to each and everyone of you for your prayers, emails, messages, comments and support....

You all are the loveliest.

May He be glorified.....

From Our House

2011-01-11T15:18:00.001-06:00

Hello Sweet Readers!

I wanted to give you an important piece of information that I left out of my post for Edie by mistake.

She is receiving mail. If you would like to send her a word of encouragement or a gift card or any wonderful thing you feel led to do, please do so!!

Edie has mentioned that she is being very well taken care of and her needs are all provided for, but her sister has offered her address if anyone would like to reach out during this difficult time.

I just know it would mean the world to her.

Here is the address:

Gina Williams
506 Helton Road
Maryville, TN 37804

We love you Edie!!!

Let's see what else.....

We moved. About 13 days or so before Christmas.

Let's just talk about that for a minute. I don't ever want to do that again. Moving or moving right before Christmas. Or moving right before Christmas almost 9 months pregnant. No thank you.

And let's add in a birthday for a very special little girl. And Nutcracker rehearsals down at the City Ballet.

And then, just to see what I'm made of. Let's see what happens when that very special little girl comes down with pneumonia in both lungs and almost ends up in the hospital.

My sweet girl has never been so sick. She missed the entire last week of school, her school Christmas performance and 4 out of her 5 Nutcracker performances. We had also just moved and so our home wasn't exactly organized just yet.. I have never felt so out of sorts.

And then, the rest of the family was hit. Ear infections, the flu, labored breathing, the croup and I ended up in the ER with bronchitis. I lost count with how many times we visited the pediatricians office and the hospital. But I'm pretty sure we paid the equivalent to a huge car note in insurance co-pays.

Lovely.

It wasn't our best Christmas. But we were so thankful that we were all together and on the mend by the time Christmas Day arrived.

The move is over. The holidays are over. And I am still expecting! I absolutely love pregnancy. Love it.

We are so anxious and excited to meet our sweet Prince Preston.... and after my appointment this morning it looks like it's going to be any day now!

I don't think that he is going to be as big as his brothers were. Thank you Jesus.
I would rather not deliver another almost 9 and almost 10 pound baby again!!

We are praying for a beautiful, healthy and supernatural labor and delivery and ask you for your prayers too. We are grateful for every, single one and it means so much to us to know that you will be holding us up during this time.

There are some logistical issues that keep me up at night. As you can imagine with a family this size.
And with trying to get our oldest home from college to spend the night with the little kids and to stay with them during my short stay at the hospital. And with trying to get everyone to school and home from school. Homework. Dinner. Ponytails. Dressing the Polly Pockets. Playing Star Wars. You know....the usual things.

All the things I love to do but just won't be able to for a day or two. Hopefully they can survive if their favorite Superman shirt isn't clean and they have to eat Macaroni and Cheese. Again.

Thankfully Macey has the sweetest friend in the world, Andrea (we all love you so) who just so happens to love babies as much as I do and has offered to drive Macey home from college to us no matter what. But I worry about the girls missing their classes and the long drive in this horrible weather we have been having and so on.

A Mother's love. We worry about them. No matter their age.

But God. He is bigger than all of our needs and all of our worries. I know that He will divinely orchestrate it all, even if it seems impossible right now.

I wanted to thank you all so much for your sweet comments on my New Years post. I know that we have all walked through something similar to some degree and your encouraging comments and support mean so much.

It is amazing to me, the more transparent I am here on the pages of P and G, the more I open up and share the real. The true. The genuine. The good. The bad. The wonderful. The painful. The beautiful.

The more you seem to resonate and relate and respond. Grateful me.
The human spirit is an amazing thing.....

Some of you sent e-mails that caused this very pregnant woman to bawl her eyes out and I shared them with Mr. P and G and he was speechless. And teary eyed. Thank you for taking the time to write to me.
I want to write you back and know that I will when I can find a moment and the right words to respond to so many beautiful e-mails.

I'm piled up in bed with my babies right now on this special snow day and we are counting contractions......

7 minutes apart right now.

I'll write again as soon as I can and look forward to sharing tons of pictures.

Love and Miracles......

Pearls For Edie

2011-01-04T11:01:00.001-06:00

I wanted to send some love and hope today to our amazing friend Edie. I know that she is loved by many and has a tremendous presence in the blog world.

I had the privilege of meeting her at Blissdom last year. And I loved her.

She came bearing gifts and hugs.

The mark of a true southern woman.

We love the same Jesus and the same cupcakes. The more frosting the better.

She is bigger than life.

She is real. She is true. She is genuine.

She has an inner radiance that shines outward and she is even more beautiful in person.

She is part Lucille Ball, part Beth Moore and part Paula Deen.

But looks like she could be on the cover of the latest issue of Glamour.

She is stunning.

She has a great, big, beautiful spirit and a magnetic personality that draws you in and leaves you
wishing she lived right next door.

As so many of you already know, Edie lost all of her worldly possessions in a horrible fire the week of Christmas. My heart breaks for her. She has written about her experience and shared her heart so beautifully and so humbly that there is no denying that she knows Him.......

In a very real and very tangible way that goes way beyond just sitting in church on a Sunday.

She will make you want to know Him too, in more ways than one.

Today is Edie's birthday and the blog world is celebrating her post by post. Maybe you would like to join in too...

There is so much to say. So much to share. So much to offer her.

Dearest Edie,

We rejoice over you today with singing and with words of hope and life and encouragement!
We celebrate the incredible gift that you are and trust Him that He is bringing you through and giving you beauty for ashes. We all love you and honor you today and wish we could be with you in person....to light your candles, to share some cake, to offer a gift, to listen in love, to whisper hope, to sing your praises, to give back to you in some small way the many ways you have given to each one of us.

Happy birthday beautiful Edie... You are His pearl.... Romans 8:18

"For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared to the glory which shall be revealed in us."

A New Decade

2011-01-01T13:01:00.000-06:00

Photo Credit: Martha Stewart

A happy and blessed new year to each and every one of you! I am so thankful for new beginnings. For the chance to start again. A fresh start. For another opportunity to do those things that I think I cannot do. To push through. To learn from what I thought were limitations. To rise above the obstacles, adversity and incredibly painful experiences that tried to take up permanent residence in my life and in my heart over the past year.

2010 is the end of a year that we are thankful to let go of but more importantly it is the end of a decade.
The end of a ten year long lesson on overcoming. Rising above. Coming undone. Being unraveled.
And most importantly learning, growing and becoming closer to Him through it all.

I have clung to Him. In ways in which I could never write about here. Through experiences that I am saving to share about in the book that I believe He is bringing forth. Things I never dreamed I would have to walk through.

But I am thankful that I did.

Over the last ten years I have been pressed down so hard I didn't think I would ever recover. We have walked through so much and our testimony has grown so wide and so deep that at times, our circumstances caused us to question our faith. Do we really believe what we say we believe?

Yes. We do. I do. I know that God is good and that He is for me and not against me no matter what the circumstances look like. I trust Him still . Even though He has allowed untold hardship and adversity. Many years of it.

I know Him to be good, and loving, and faithful even when our lives and situations do not match His promises. He is still good.

He has blessed me with a family of my very own and woke me up this morning and gave me the start of a brand new year with each and every one of them.

I can't sing His praises enough for that and that alone.

Last year during this time I prayed a prayer that changed my life. I asked in that prayer that God would fulfill His purpose. That He would have His way. That His will would be done- no matter what. And that He would remove any and all hindrances. That He would unravel any false beliefs or anything that was keeping me from Him. That also, He would remove any person from my life who was not really for me and my family. Who was not the real deal. That He would show me - clearly- so that I did not waste any more time and energy and effort with things, situations and friendships that were not from Him or that were not of Him.

Not everyone is meant to be a part of our destiny. There are just a few. The faithful ones.

And I wanted so desperately to know them.

I wanted the divinely orchestrated in every single area of my life.

I have such a big family whom I love caring for that I no longer wanted to waste any time away from them on friendships that weren't at all what He had planned for me.

I wish someone would have warned me what was about to happen when you pray a prayer like that.

He is faithful.

Talk about unraveling my life. Talk about revealing the hidden things. Talk about showing me clearly who was really for me and my family.

Imagine how heartsick I was when my own Mother walked out of my life. Again. There are days that it is still so hard for me to believe. Especially after all the years that the Lord restored. Or so I thought.

There have been days over the past year that I could barely stand because the process that I prayed for was just too much. I wanted it to stop and did not want to know another thing. I pleaded with Him as one by one He uncovered betrayal after betrayal and mean spirited hearts. I was being unraveled as He revealed the hidden things in my life......

Sweet Jesus.

He showed me friendships where I had given way too much and was just being used over and over again. He showed me a friendship that was so one sided and was completely for the sole benefit of the other person- who seemed to have developed a hobby of copying every single thing I did. Whether it be my clothes. My children's clothes. Things in my home. The way I write. The way I talk. The way I give gifts and pull things together in my home. The way I decorated my nursery- as humble and minimal as it was. Everything and made no apologies about it. She was relentless.

It was heartbreaking for me to feel so used after giving so much.

He even allowed my cell phone to ring by mistake one afternoon and allowed me to hear a conversation between two "friends" who were with one of my children on a play date. I sat and listened with tears streaming down my face as my "friends" criticized and judged me up one side and down another about the size of my family, among other things. I remember hanging up the phone, going straight to the play date to pick up my child and never mentioning a word to anyone. I was thankful for the knowledge as painful as it was but I was so hurt and felt like giving up on ever finding a single divine friendship.

He showed me very clearly exactly what I had asked Him to .....He also allowed me to even discover someone doing her best to impersonate me on line- even stealing my posts and highjacking my spirit and doing her best to emulate me. Someone who caused a lot of problems for me in real life was now attempting to do the same thing in the blog world. A true enemy.

And He challenged me to pray for them. All of them and so many others and other situations that I haven't even mentioned. They are too numerous to even mention.

I pressed through praying for them one by one. All of them. Through tears and what felt like a pain inside my bones, I have spent the last year praying for and blessing those who have hurt us, rejected us, wronged us, betrayed us and who have spitefully used us- just like He asked us to.

And it has pressed me and challenged me in ways that I never knew were possible.

All of this and so much more made me want to never write another post again. Go private or close it down and retreat to simply be alone with my family.

Exactly what the enemy wanted.

From the very first post ~ the very first day~ over three years ago, I have given Him the glory and written about Him and my own personal experiences that have tied me to Him.

It wasn't something I saw someone else doing- and then tried to copy it. I knew no one in the blog world and I knew of no one in real life who had a blog.

It is completely and one hundred percent original. So it is painful when someone tries to steal what He has done. It cuts down to the bone and marrow. And has made me want to stop writing. Completely.

It is and has always been His original idea~ and I have always felt humbled and honored to be the vessel typing the God-breathed words out on the keyboard. I have always loved writing here and am very passionate about it and have felt such despair over what I have walked through this past year personally.

It has definitely been reflected in my lack of posting.

And so after spending some time with Him and receiving those things that only He can give....

I am going to press on and press in and refuse to retreat or shrink back or write less in the new year. I am keeping closer to Him than ever before and refuse to be less than who has called me to be but desire to continue on no matter who or what tries to stop what He wants to do. I hope and pray at the start of this brand new year and brand new decade to receive every good and perfect gift that He has for me and my family and nothing less.

And the book......my hearts deepest desire. ......I am believing this is the year.

I pray that this would be the year of the fulfillment of His promises and that ALL we have experienced and walked through and survived during the last decade would become the raining down that He talks about so beautifully in His word. That we would receive the former rain and the latter rain and every beautiful thing that He has stored up for those who love Him.

We have been praying for the raining down of recompense in the spiritual and in the natural. So you can imagine my heart singing when I woke up this morning, on the very first day of this new year to ....
the rain absolutely pouring outside. Only He could do that.

May you receive it all in the days and weeks and months to come sweet friends.

Happy New Beginnings...

The Sweetest Gift

2010-12-26T11:24:00.000-06:00

Thrilled. Overjoyed. Without words. Blessed beyond measure. Unspeakable Joy.

Just a few words to describe how we are feeling about the impending arrival of our precious baby..........

BOY!

Five weeks or less! The last four have all come early! So......we are expecting his arrival any day now.

We are busy nesting and preparing our hearts and our home and the rest of his siblings for his arrival.

We can hardly wait to have a newborn in the house again.

There is nothing that can compare to the sight, sounds and smell of a tiny gift in the house.

He is our little prince. Our sweet beloved. The part that the Lord talks about in His word that has caused our cup to completely overflow. We are thankful and grateful and humbled that He has entrusted us once again.

We are counting down the days until we can hold in our arms our sweet little...........

Preston Grant

Named after both of his sweet brothers and the GREAT things that the Lord has done.

Preston is part of Bennett's middle name and part of Ashton's first name. Grant means great.......

And our Lord is great and greatly to be praised.....

Hope you all had the best and most beautiful Christmas ever. Be back soon to share Christmas pictures.

Prayers For Granny Smith Green

2010-12-21T10:01:00.000-06:00

I am writing this post with such a heavy heart this morning.

Our dear friend Granny Smith Green lost her precious Father yesterday morning.

Suddenly.

Five days before Christmas.

Sweet Jesus.

What a tremendous loss...

I know that he is in the arms of our loving heavenly Father right now......

But my heart aches for my real life friend and for what she is having to walk through right now along with the rest of her family.

I know this blogger personally. She is a precious soul. And her heart is just like His.

Please pray for GSG and her entire family right now sweet friends. I know it would mean the world to her.

Gran,

May the Comforter come upon you in a new way this morning. May He pour out from the heavenly places the oil of joy for your mourning, and give you a garment of praise for your spirit of heaviness. May He minister to your broken heart in the deep places with His love, His peace, His grace and His power in the most beautiful and supernatural ways. May He send people to you during this difficult time who would be His mouthpiece, His hands and His feet to minister and demonstrate His very words of hope and encouragement to you during your time of loss and may you feel His love for you in a very tangible way in the days and weeks to come precious friend.

My love and prayers to you.......

Merry Christmas Sugarplums

2010-12-01T10:51:00.000-06:00

Photo Credit: Martha Stewart

Merry Christmas! Hope that you all have enjoyed the start of a glorious season!

We spent a few days away as a family and I can't tell you what a trip to the beach does for my soul..... It is an amazing healing balm. We were so blessed to receive this short, little trip as a special gift and it blessed our family immensely! We prayed for the weather to be beautiful and warm and could not believe how warm it was while we were there. Grateful me.

I did not care a thing about food or a meal or shopping or anything like that. I just wanted to sit on the beach and watch my four precious ones soak up the sun, play in the sand and splash around in the water and thank Him for allowing us this time together as a family. I have grown to cherish every precious second of it since our family time has been shortened to only the weekends over the last 18 months.

I also took a few pictures.

Hundreds of pictures I mean....... of their tiny hands and feet. Of them playing and dancing and splashing around together. Oh my gracious, how I love to be behind the camera......

I love it so much I think I could almost.....almost take a leap of faith and make a small career out of it.

But family first and we will see what the Lord has in store.

I have serious e-mail debt. If you have written me an e-mail and have not heard back it is not because I chose not to respond. It is because I desire to write you back in a special response and even enclose a prayer as I usually do. I do not like a short, quick response. I want to write and respond with whatever the Lord prompts me with and that takes time......and so my apologies. I still respond to every, single e-mail.

And it makes my heart sing that you would take the time to write to me. To share your heart, your struggles and your stories. It is a tremendous blessing and I thank you for trusting me.

Let's see. I know what the baby is!!

And I'm having a fit to share it with all of you and have some special pictures that go with, but have no way to upload any pictures on my sweet friends' computer. But soon!

We are overjoyed with excitement!!! Squuueeeeeeeeeeeeal!

I have tons of pictures to share!! You may remember that we lost our computers due to some serious electrical issues here. I am thankful that we had all of our pictures backed up!! But we still haven't purchased a new computer yet. Soon hopefully.

We are also in the middle of moving. We finally found a place and thank Him every day for blessing us with a new place to call home. Thankfully our new place has an office so Big Daddy can work from home now! The plan is to work one week here and one week there. Which means he will be home for about 10 days at a time.

I may hear the angels singing. Glory!!!!!

18 months of doing everything solo!!!! I think it's over. I have no concept of how I survived it all.

By His Grace Alone.

My sweet Bella Grace auditioned for the City Ballet Nutcracker back in the early fall and made it! I am so proud of her!! This was a huge leap of faith for her. She is incredibly shy and introverted but has such a love for ballet and for music. We wanted to give her the opportunity to at least try out and knew if she could get past her fears she would love every second of it! She was hesitant. She shed a few tears. She didn't know anyone. She needed encouragement , love and support and we poured it out! I am so proud of her for overcoming her fears! Opening night is next weekend and I will be sitting in the audience with a huge arrangement of fluffy pink roses tied up with pink tulle and sprinkled with glitter! Cannot wait to watch her do what she loves to do.......

Our December is filled with many Nutcracker performaces, school Christmas programs, a major move, Christmas, a birthday and a 21st birthday in January as well as the arrival of this precious newborn baby!

I am in full nesting mode and we are moving in starting this weekend. I have been busy gathering things for our new little one as well as going through everything and editing ,sorting and organizing!!

I even purchased those itty, bitty newborn diapers over the weekend. Big Sigh.....I can hardly wait.......

We are so thankful during this special time of year and I am so thankful for each of you who stop in and visit. I recently celebrated three years of P and G and cannot believe it has been that long! I love writing here as well as following along with as many of you as I can. The blog world has been a tremendous blessing for me personally. So thank you again to each one of you for sharing your heart with me, for leaving such beautiful and encouraging comments, for your continued prayers and for allowing me the privilege to pray for and encourage you. I consider it a tremendous gift.

Many blessings to you and your family during this joyful month!